Lighten the Fuck Up! They Have Sex in Hospitals...

Scott Barbour. Getty Images.

The Queen of England was visiting one of London's top hospitals and during her tour of the floors she passed a room where a male patient was masturbating furiously… 

"Oh my God!" blared the Queen, "That's disgraceful, what is the meaning of this?" she demanded…

The doctor leading the tour explained, "I'm sorry you had to see that Your Majesty, but this man has a very serious condition. His testicles rapidly fill with semen and if he doesn't masturbate at least five times a day, they would surely explode and he would die instantly." 

"Oh, I am sorry", the Queen responded sympathetically. 

On the next floor, they passed a room where a young nurse was enthusiastically giving a male patient a highly-spirited blowjob…

"Oh my God!", the Queen clamored as she ran out of the room and into the hallway, "That's disgraceful! What is happening in there?" 

The doctor turned towards the Queen and said, "Same issue, better health plan."

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