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Paulo Costa Says He Drank Too Much Wine The Night Before He Fought Stylebender And Was "Kind Of Drunk" In The Octagon

Sheeeeeeesh!!!! This might be the most ridiculous story of the year. 

I think Paulo Costa just came up with the greatest excuse for losing a fight in the history of mixed martial arts, at the very least.

Let's rewind for a sec….

After getting absolutely dominated (and then humped) in the main event of UFC 253 last September, Paulo Costa promised us that while he IS NOT a man of excuses, "something happened" before the Stylebender showdown that we'd all find out about one day…. 

Costa later told stories about entering the fight with an injured leg, and we all assumed that would be the excuse he was going with - and whether it be true or not - just moved on with our lives. 

BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE, FOLKS!

He put out a video this weekend where he snuck this little gem in there….

MMAFighting- In a video posted Saturday on his YouTube channel, Costa said Adesanya had “all the merits for knocking me out,” but was impaired the moment he entered the octagon.

“I was kind of drunk [when] I fought, maybe, on hangover,” Costa said in Portuguese. “I couldn’t sleep because of the [leg] cramps. Keep in mind that the fight happens at 9 a.m. [local time], we have to wake up at 5 to get ready, stretch, wrap the hands. The UFC told us to wake up at 5 in the morning to go to the arena to fight. I hadn’t slept until 2:30."

“It was my mistake and I don’t blame anyone else, it was something I chose [to do], but, in order to try to sleep, because I had to sleep since I was awake for 24 hours, I had wine, too much wine, a bottle [of wine] to try to black out. I had a glass and didn’t work. Two glasses, it didn’t work. Half bottle, didn’t work. I had it all.”

Guess what?! Probably can't win a fight if you're drunk in the cage! Hard not to get knocked out when you're already blacked out! Seems like a pretty damn good excuse to me!

Well, obviously, unless you're Jon Jones….

I just love everything this story; it's so preposterously MMA it hurts. I mean - a top ranked, undefeated contender claiming he was too drunk/maybe hungover to fight? THAT is why he lost? Dude really drank an entire bottle of wine to fall asleep knowing he had to be at the arena for his fight at 5am (given the Fight Island time difference)?! Did nobody smell wine on his breath/sense that he was fucked up when he got to the arena (if this is true)?!

Oh, and how about the BALLS he had to have to demand a rematch afterwards, despite his shitty drunk ass performance in the fight?! 

It's all just fucking crazy. I feel like it's one of those stories you gotta bring to the grave with ya (again, if it's true). You make a decision this dumb to blow the greatest opportunity ever given to you, and you're lucky Uncle Dana doesn't kick ya off the tour.