A Thief Tried To Rob A Restaurant With A Box Cutter But Instead Got His Ass Kicked By 6 Different Workers, With Some Using Weapons

(Source)- A would-be robber in Arizona was stopped by several restaurant employees and the whole thing was caught on camera.

The crook did cut one of the employees with a box cutter which required 16 stitches. The man is now facing charges of armed robbery, aggravated assault and burglary. He is currently being held on $50,000 bond.

I know this robber isn’t the sharpest tool in the shed and I would never confuse someone looking to knock over a restaurant for Danny Ocean. But this has to be the worst armed robbery attempt I’ve ever seen.

First of all, you can’t throw the register on the ground as things are getting started. You just can’t. It literally houses the thing you put your freedom, and in this case life, on the line to get. The stuff inside is money. Legal tender. That is the item you need to walk out of a robbery with in order to make it all worth it. And if you get ambushed by a half dozen employees, you can maybe throw it at them and hope they let you escape.

Next up, this guy has to do a better job scouting the joints he is going to rob (I feel like criminals always call the places they steal from “joints”). If this guy did, he would have known that this restaurant had a gaggle of ride-or-die employees that DO NOT fuck around and will turn an armed robbery attempt into a Hardcore Rules Battle Royal in a heartbeat. In this short video, we had a perfect chair shot, a broom, and I think even a spatula got used against the villain at hand. I honestly didn’t know what was gonna come out next. A knife? Some hot oil from the fryer? Chekhov’s register that the thief didn’t realize could be weaponizes? Regardless that is a crew you do not fuck with. In particular Gray Hoodie Guy. That dude went from bringing brooms into the brouhaha right off the bat to laying fists into the robber’s skull long after he was clearly subdued. To be honest, I think GHG was going through some shit and that poor thieving fuck’s face ended up as the recipient of all the anger he had battled up like when Ralphie snapped and beat the bag off of that cocksucker ginger bully in A Christmas Story.