Tom Brady Takes the High Road on Andrew Luck and Doesn't Mention He's the Latest Victim of the Curse of Deflategate

Tom Brady this morning on WEEI, when asked about Andrew Luck’s retirement:

“He had a great career and he was a great player. Everybody wishes they could be healthy all the time. It is a contact sport and he’s certainly had his fair share of injuries, so guys retire at different times. …

“Everything in my view really has to come together for you to be the best version of yourself as a player, and it takes a lot of support. It takes a lot of people. You see certainly, you can see me as an individual doing that. I have the support of my teammates, my coaches, my family, my friends, Alex (Guerrero), my training system. All those things really need to come together in order to continue to achieve.

“It feels great when you have that support because a football season is like a marathon. There’s moments where it is very challenging whether it’s physically, emotionally, or mentally — you need somebody to help you push through the hard parts because it’s not all easy. It’s a great challenge, but it is very rewarding when you meet the challenge, too.”

I guess of all the shock and awe of Andrew Luck’s retirement announcement, the one thing that’s gone exactly the way we all could’ve predicted was Tom Brady’s reaction. He continues his journey in the HOV lane of the High Road. Saying all the right things. Showing respect. Not bringing up old grudges, no matter how much they still burn.

Personally, I’ve always preferred the low road. It’s an easier ride and you get much better mileage and everybody I know is there. But in this case, I’m following Brady. Partly because he’s setting the tone on this one. But also because when the Luck news broke I was at a parents’ reception at my son’s college, the epicenter of Catholic education in the Midwest where they can’t have you fill out a form without saying a prayer first and where every presentation about campus life ends with a “Hail Mary.” So until life knocks this very temporary holiness right out of me, I’ll play nice.

But I’d be derelict in my duty as an offensive Masshole stereotype if I didn’t point out that Andrew Luck is just the latest victim of the Curse of Deflategate. Yet another archeologist who met tragedy after opening up that evil artifact back in January of 2015. I believe when Deflategate Truther Patrick Peterson got suspended a while back, I compared it to the way the Soviets disturbed the mausoleum of the conqueror Tamerlane in Uzbekistan, which was inscribed “Whosoever Disturbs My Tomb Shall Unleash an Invader More Terrible Than I.” And two days later Nazi Germany violated their non-aggression treaty and attacked, causing the deaths of tens of millions on both sides.

Since Deflategate, the Colts have fallen off the map. Ryan Grigson got fired. The Ravens have gone 32-32  and haven’t won a playoff game. Jerry Rice was exposed for cheating using Stick Um. ESPN has lost millions and laid off hundreds of workers. Mike Kensil was exiled to China. Kelly Naqi went from falsely claiming the Patriots doctored the kicking balls to going into hiding. Bob Kravitz lost his job. Texans owner Bob McNair dropped dead. Even D’Qwell Jackson, an innocent patsy in the whole thing who has always told the truth about what nonsense it all was, got suspended for performance enhancers.

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And now Luck, who was an unwitting party to the whole mess, sees his career end much, much too soon. It’s sad and tragic. But it’s what happens when humans mess with supernatural forces far beyond our understanding and control. Which makes me think Luck will undoubtedly not be the last such innocent party to suffer from the opening of that Ark of the Covenant.

I’m going to be a good Christian and stay on that high road. Meaning I won’t make much of a point of what the Patriots did to Luck throughout his career. How he was 0-6 against them, including playoffs. Or how his Colts lost those six games by an average score of 43.5 to 20.6. Or how his Passer Rating against them was 83.6 in the regular season and 39.1 in the post, which is slightly more than half of his career postseason number. Jesus would not want me to take this time to point out that Andrew Luck was a Rubik’s Cube and Bill Belchick was one of those guys who can solve it so fast you can barely see his hands move.

Instead, I’ll just remember Andrew Luck this way. Back around 2013, when he was in the midst of a great start to his career and one of the most promising QB prospects of our lifetimes, I was doing a weekly segment with Felger and Mazz. And they asked me then if I’d be willing to trade the then 36 year old Brady for the 24 year old Luck. Brady was then almost a decade removed from his last championship and there was talk about him coming to the end of his career. But I said no. Because, I said, we know what Brady is capable of carrying a team to a championship, but Luck is an unknown quantity. He might be great, but he might also turn out to be the Charles Barkley of quarterbacks, the guy who could never elevate his game enough in the postseason to get a ring. For that I was slandered, libeled, called words my kid’s professors never heard in the Bible. I’d point out how right I was all those years ago, but it wouldn’t be High Hoad.

I’ll end with this. Next time someone claims Gisele is forcing an end to her husband’s career because she told Charlie Rose – while he was taking a break from forcing his female staffers to look at his drooping ballsack – that she’d like him to retire and spend more time at home, remind them of this. Andrew Luck was married in June. And retired in mid-August. While Brady is talking about his support system and making plans for this year and the years beyond. Don’t let anyone forget that.