Here Are The Top 5 Goals From The NHL Last Night (10/4/18)
Alright so people seemed to enjoy this after the opener so we’ll try our best to make this a daily routine here. The top 5 goals from last night’s action in the NHL. Just a nice, easy way to kill some time during your morning commute or to ease into your work day while watching some of the silkiest Sauce Gods do what they do best, and fill the back of the net. I feel like I should mention this again but these are my personal top 5 goals from each night so if I don’t include a specific goal from your specific team, it is 100% because I hate your team and I hate your family and I hate you. Anyhoo, here are your top 5 genos from Thursday October 4th.
Quick sidenote: I know that sometimes the streamable videos don’t work on desktop if you’re using Chrome. Why? I have no fucking idea. I’m a blogger, not an IT guy. But I’ll put a direct link to the video under each one and that should do the trick.
5. The Bruins Were Saving Up On This Ryan Donato Goal For A While
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So obviously opening night was a little rough for the B’s. In case you forgot, they lost their season opener by a score of 7-0. But playing against Buffalo is a pretty easy way to get the boys buzzin a bit and this goal right here was a gem. You’ll see that pretty puck movement was definitely a theme across the league last night and it doesn’t get too much better than this one. For what a little rat piece of shit Brad Marchand is, you forget sometimes that when he actually goes out there to play hockey instead of being a prick, he can do shit like this.
Kicks up the leg. Sells the shot so he not only gets Ristolainen to drop down to a knee but he also freezes up Hutton. And then it’s just a perfect pass for a little tap in for Donato. That’s just Brad Marchand’s game right there. It’s so sneaky. Sometimes he’ll sneak you with a punch to the face, and sometimes he’ll sneak you with a beauty of a feed for an easy goal.
4. Dallas Scores 3 Goals In 96 Seconds In A 3-0 Game
Now the best goal out of the bunch here is clearly this sorcery from Alex Radulov. Wins the battle to the loose puck. Kicks it too himself on the backhand and then sneaks it by Raanta.
That’s a big dick hockey goal right there for Radulov. But yeah. A 3-0 game where the only goals of the night came within 1 minute and 36 seconds of each other.
It was a few minutes into the 2nd period so everybody should have been back in their seats by then after the intermission. But can you imagine if you were still in line for the pisser between periods? Let’s say you stood in line to grab a beer after the 1st. Then you realized, “ah shit, I should probably rock a piss real quick before the 2nd gets going. 1st period was boring anyway so if I miss a couple minutes, no big deal”. Then you come out of the bathroom and it’s 3-0 Dallas and then not a single goal is scored the rest of the night. Tough look for Biz piping up Antti Raanta as a Vezina guy when he gets shelled like that right off the bat.
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3. Pretty Decent Puck Movement From The Penguins Here, If We’re Being Totes Honest
This right here is one of those goals where you have to feel bad for the powerplay coach in Pittsburgh. I don’t know if those guys get bonuses or not at the end of the season depending on what percentage the powerplay operates at. But for all intents and purposes, this is a powerplay goal that gets marked down as even strength. When Pittsburgh has that many studs out there on their top unit, you need to bust your goddamn ass back into the play the second your penalty is over. You just gave them 2 minutes to work with on a man advantage, giving them even a few more seconds is ill advised to say the least. Because if you coast back into the zone after your penalty is up, something like this happens.
You’ve got Kessel who draws FOUR (4) Caps under the hashmarks by driving the puck down into the corner.
That opens up a ton of space for Sid to kick it back up top to Letang for the Tic. Then Washington has to scramble to get up to Letang, who then makes a fucking filthy pass to Malkin for the Tac. And then Malkin goes Toe the back of the net. Decent.
2. Patrik Laine Is Already Making Goalies Look Foolish Out There This Season
It’s just rude at this point, is what it is. Patrik Laine is only 20 years old and he’s starting his 3rd season in the NHL. He already ended the season for Vancouver by chirping their soft asses for blaming video games for sucking. And then last night he ended the season for Jake Allen already by making him look like a high school JV goalie trying to track this laser beam.
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This is the National Hockey League. It’s filled with the best hockey players in the world. And even at the highest level, Patrik Laine can make goalies look like this. Just watch Allen’s glove and his eyes. He has no idea. He’s in a blender with that shot. The only thing he can do is turn around to pull the puck out of the net and pray that it doesn’t happen again. Laine is putting up 50+ this year as long as he shoots the puck at least 60 times. I’ll give goalies 10 lucky saves but that’s it.
1. Kane Is Able… To Do Shit Like This In Overtime
God. Damn. I don’t think I’m going to be able to blog for the rest of the day because I’m just going to watch this GIF on loop for the next 10 hours straight.
Granted, the puck was on its edge but that was a pretty shitty feed from Jonathan Toews. If that’s to anybody else besides Patrick Kane, chances are it takes a bad bounce off the skate and either the play ends up going the other way or it gets blown dead for offside. But Patty Kane somehow has the touch to control the bouncing puck off the boot, and then still gives Craig Anderson a free roof job from the bottom of the circles on the backhand over the shoulder. I feel like goalies just need to go back to the way they used to play in the 50s and just stay standing straight up when Patrick Kane is coming down on a breakaway. The moment Anderson drops down to his knee here, Kane knows he’s adding a nice little reel to his highlight. He knows he’s going top bunk. If Anderson just stands straight up, there’s still a chance that Kane scores but at least it won’t be as pretty. Just a thought, ya know? I’m not a goalie coach but I feel bad they’re constantly getting dummied by 88.