Groom Tries To Drown Himself At His Wedding Because His Arranged Marriage Wife Was Too Ugly - Daily Mail March 31st

Yahoo – ‘I feel bad about what happened but when I saw her she wasn’t what I had expected and I realised she would be bad for my image. ‘My parents had arranged this and I couldn’t see any way out apart from suicide.’

Hey listen your parents dont dress you when you become an adult, right? You get to manage your own style and your own image on that front, right? So why the fuck do they get to mess with your image by giving you an ugly wife? Certainly doesnt seem right to me. Nothing worse for a dude’s image than walking around with an ugly chick on his arm. I mean look at Roger Federer. Dude is like the best tennis player of all time and worth millions but all I ever think about is how his wife is busted. It just erases anything good about your image if you got an ugly wife.

So I’m with Kang on this one. I’d probably try to kill myself before living out my days with an ugly chick that I didnt even pick out.

We also talk about LBJ’s dick, the secret underground Playboy tunnels, permission slips to eat cookies and Pizza Hut’s abnormally hard croutons. And yes, I realized I mixed up Kirk Douglas and Michael Douglas. But I’m sure both of those dudes ate tons of Playboy pussy either way so whats the difference?

Also, here’s the link I talked about to get reduced admission to our party this weekend out on Long Island. We got a live band and $3 Bud Light, $3 well drinks, and $4 Fireball shots out at Mulcahy’s in Wantagh this Friday at 10pm.