Get To Know The Newest Knick: Robin Lopez AKA RoLo
So after all the rumors about Greg Monroe being a lock, to LaMarcus Aldridge cancelling his meeting with the Knicks because they wanted him to play center, to DeAndre Jordan potentially ending up in New York, here we are.
I already talked about Monroe on Thursday. The LaMarcus Aldridge thing boggles my mind. The Knicks actually giving up all their leverage because of a position that barely even exists in today’s NBA is idiotic. Just say “Melo you are playing power forward, LaMarcus you are playing the taller power forward”. Problem solved. Shit, if I was Phil, I would have told Aldridge he could be point guard just to get him to sign on that dotted line. But LaMarcus was always kind of a pipe dream anyway (insert J.R. Smith joke here).
As for DeAndre Jordan, he can enjoy his time in Dallas. A 4-year max guy that can’t shoot free throws and became a max-player because of a few seasons with Chris Paul as his point guard scares me for a team that has Langston Galloway and Jose Calderon handling the ball.
Anyway, this blog is about getting to know Robin Lopez, so lets meet RoLo. I hate to admit it, but I kind of love that nickname. Partially because YOLO is a ridiculous phrase, partially because Rolos are the most underrated chocolate candy in the game.
Between Lopez and Afflalo, the Knicks got two decent starters and didn’t have to spend a huge amount of money to do it. Is Lopez overpaid a bit? Probably. But you can make the case that the Knicks got Afflalo at a good price, so it kind of evens outs in the end. And if you don’t pay Lopez, what are the Knicks’ options at center? They needed interior defense and Lopez provides that while also being a good rebounder and not needing the ball in his hand to be effective (something important on any team that has Melo on it). Is it kind of a boring signing? Of course. But it is what it is. The Knicks are trying to build a team after the worst season in franchise history. Drafting Porzingis told us that the plan is to build not to try to patchwork a “contender”. Not having a pick next year is a very, VERY cruel punch in the dick, but I think if they stay healthy, the Knicks will compete for a playoff spot in the awful Eastern Conference. And make no mistake about it, next season’s goal should be to make sure the pick they traded does not turn into the No. 1 pick for another team.
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Anyway, back to RoLo. RoLo considers himself the Screech Powers of the NBA. Does that mean he’s the quirky guy that doesn’t feel like he fits in? Does it mean that he plans on pulling knives on people and making porns after his playing days are over? I am not sure.
I saw that RoLo had a link in his Twitter bio to a Twitter handle called eegbeeva88. So I clicked on the link, got a bunch of Asian gibberish, and then clicked the handy Google Translate button. And this is what I got. I think RoLo may be the sick, twisted version of Screech.
Okay, that was fucking weird. Moving along…
He loves Disneyland, comic books, wizards, and Angela Lansbury. A lot. Like weirdly a lot.
Since you’ve become famous, have you been to the secret Disneyland club that serves alcohol?
Club 33? It’s cool. Brook and I became members. That’s one of the things we always wanted to do since we were little, because you always hear about it. Going up there for the first time, that felt like holy ground a little bit. It was surreal.
How many comics do you own?
Not as many as Brook. He’s pretty much collecting everything DC Comics publishes right now. I have two or three titles I’ve collected and tried to complete those runs.
What are your top three favorite wizards?
Gandalf’s definitely on the list. Trying to pick my favorite Harry Potter wizard, I can easily go with Dumbledore. I always liked Professor Lupin. I’ll put him on the list. [A day after the interview, Lopez asked via his publicist to take Lupin off his list and replace him with Hermione Granger.]
I got to pick a Disney wizard. Can I pick Angela Lansbury in Bedknobs and Broomsticks?
Angela Lansbury?
She’s not a particularly great wizard, but I just love that movie so much. Maybe it’s the combination of her and David Tomlinson’s character. Those are my three.
RoLo also loves fighting mascots. Now does it seem a little JJ Watt-esque? Sure. But I think Robin likes fighting mascots because he is a weirdo that thinks he is actually fighting real cartoon versions of raptors, hawks, etc.
So to wrap things up, Robin Lopez is kind of a weirdo. But he’s our 7 foot weirdo, so lets try to make him feel welcome. Unless you thought the Lou Amundson Era was fun.
Also, the Knicks added Derrick Williams last night after 4 years of disappointment in the NBA. Before the 2011 draft, some people thought Williams would be a better pro than Kyrie Irving, who went first overall. But obviously his career hasn’t panned out like that. I always like the Knicks taking a chance on someone with a ton of talent to a 2-year flyer, even if there is like a 95% chance he continues to disappoint. Since my dreams of a David Lee reunion were crushed, I guess this is the next best thing.
Then again, things could always be worse. The Knicks could be the Nets, who got burnt by Linda Cohn’s hot mic the other day.
Anyway, thanks to the people that actually made it this far and enjoy your 4th of July. Drink some domestic beers, eat some burgers and dogs, and keep making America the best country on the planet. I leave you with one of the best scenes in cinematic history, the 4th of July fireworks scene from The Sandlot. God Bless America.