Monday Morning Golf Recap

Tournament Details:

Name: RBC Heritage

Dates: April 16th – April 19th

Golf Course: Harbour Town GL

Location: Hilton Head, South Carolina

Purse: $5,900,000

2014 Winner: Matt Kuchar

Tournament Recap:

Guess what guys.  Another tournament that ended in a playoff!  It’s uncanny.  The 2015 season has been all about playoffs so far.  Aside from a couple tournaments it’s been all playoffs all the time. It’s fun for golf fans.  Playoffs mean bunched leaderboards and bunched leaderboards mean fun Sundays.  Yesterday at the RBC Heritage was a little different because weather forced tee times to be moved up to the early morning so we didn’t get to see it live.  By the time TV coverage started the leaders had already finished and we knew the outcome.  I’ll tell you what, I have zero power and zero clout, but one day I’m gonna get this whole golf-on-TV thing fixed.  The Masters is a different animal but you know what’d be great?  If when tee times get moved up because of bad weather the powers that be said, “Hey, let’s start TV coverage earlier so people can watch.”  Then again, yesterday all anybody was watching were the NHL and NBA playoffs so who gives a shit.

Anyyyyyyway.  This is all about Jim Furyk.  Sure, we could talk about how Troy Merritt shot a 61 on Friday, had a big lead and eventually lost it but we’re not going to.  We’re gonna talk about that 44-year-old dude with the weird swing, Jimmy Furs!  He needed this badly.  Furyk is clearly an accomplished golfer.  He’s a major championship winner.  He won the FedEx Cup (and the $10 million that goes along with it) back in 2010.  Before yesterday he’d won 16 PGA events.  The guy is good.  But he hadn’t won in 5 years and was 0-for-9 when leading a tournament after three rounds.  Long story short, yesterday’s win unloaded a lot of baggage that has packed up on Furyk the past 5 years.

His celebration said it all:

Drops the putt and unleashes a fist pump BEFORE the putt even drops.  That fist pump unleashed almost 5 years of waiting and waiting all at once.  He said exactly that after the round: “That was four-and-a-half years of frustration in the celebration.”  It was more stressful than Furyk wanted it to be though.  He shot a final round 63 and was the leader in the clubhouse at -18.  Smooth sailing from there right?  Put on that plaid jacket and hoist the trophy?  Nope.  Because nothing has come easy for Furyk the past few years.

Enter 31-year-old Kevin Kisner

“Of course.”  That’s what had to be going through Furyk’s mind.  It ended up not mattering in the long run.  They headed to a playoff and both birdied the first playoff hole (where Kisner sank a 20-footer and I thought Furyk was gonna have a heart attack).  But then Kisner parred the second playoff hole and Furyk birdied it with the putt you saw above.  Good for Furyk.  We might’ve had to strap a straight jacket on him and thrown him in a padded room had he let that one slip away.  There’s only so much a man can take before he snaps.

Furyk’s scorecards

Shot of the Week:

We’ve got a first this week!  Our SOTW comes from the LPGA.  Well, it’s actually two shots but they’re incredible.  Sei Young Kim holing two ridiculous shots to win the tournament.  The first was a chip right off the green on 18 that she needed to hole for par in order to force a playoff.  She nailed it.  THEN she holes out for eagle from 150 yards out on the playoff hole to win the tournament.  If you’re the other girl in the playoff you have every right to be like, “Hey, are you fucking kidding me?  I had this thing won.”

Other candidates for SOTW:

Showed it earlier but Kisner’s clutch birdie on 18 to force a playoff with Furyk.  Just sticks that shot to within 7 feet and sinks the putt.  Balls.

This would’ve been the SOTW had it not been for what happened at the LPGA event.  We talked about it above but Furyk’s putt during the playoff to win and the celebration.

Fan of the Week:

Had to be this drunk guy who refused to leave his hat behind.  This didn’t even happen at the RBC Heritage.  Pretty sure it was at an LPGA event but it doesn’t matter.  He’s the most deserving FOTW of all the FOTWs we’ve ever had.  Dude was so drunk that the thought of, “Shit.  I paid $18 for that hat and the wind blew it into the damn water.  Well I can’t just flush 18 bucks down the drain like that.  I know I’ll wade into the water and get it.  Not like there’s cameras around or anything” sounded like a good idea.  Well hats off to him (puns).  He’s an inspiration to drunk guys on a golf course everywhere.

Random shit:

Jordan Spieth’s 2nd-round 62 on Friday less than a week after the Masters

I don’t wanna say Spieth’s 62 on Friday got overlooked or anything because it didn’t.  News outlets covered it and made a big deal because it was a big deal.  The dude had won the Masters less than a week before, decided to honor his commitment to the RBC Heritage (class move) and then fires a RIDICULOUS 62 on Friday.  And that’s after shooting a 74 on Thursday and people punching each other in the face to see who could say, “MASTERS HANGOVER!  MASTERS HANGOVER!” the fastest. Let’s be honest though.  The reason that 62 is a big deal is because all of us would still be partying our faces off.  He won the Masters!  If that’s me, I take a solid month off and rage face until my heart explodes.  Maybe that’s why he’s Masters champion Jordan Spieth and I’m just some idiot on the internet.  You can’t help but respect a guy who reaches the mountain top and is still like, “Alright, let’s go to work.”

Played my first 9 holes of 2015 on Saturday

I snuck out early Saturday morning and played a quick 9 with my buddies.  Felt good.  Felt great.  Not my swing, it just felt good to get back out there.  It was a perfect morning.  My slice survived the winter which isn’t surprising.  This much I’m sure of: If the game of golf didn’t involve long distance iron shots then I’d be on the PGA Tour.  My drives are fine (ya know, when I aim way left, play the slice and lose 50 yards of distance) and my putting is fine.  Even my touch around the greens is okay.  It’s those goddamn iron shots that derail everything.  Off the toe into the woods, top it, worm burner, everything.  They’re impossible.  Oh well.  And yes, I’m still sore.  Like really sore.  I’m ready to play again though.

UPDATE: Meant to post the score. Sorry.  I shot a masterful 48.

Do less, Bubba Watson.  Do so much less.

If you don’t hate Bubba Watson at this point then I don’t know what to tell you.  He shows all the signs of being one of the biggest posers in the world.  He acts like the, “Oh I’m just a good ol’ boy from the south who likes to have fun and enjoy himself.  I’m a fun guy!  Look at my hovercraft and trick shots!  Praise the lord!”  When in reality he’s just a massive asshole who thinks he’s awesome but nobody actually likes him.  Watch that video below.  He thinks that’s the coolest thing ever.  Trying soooooo hard.  Here’s some advice, Bubba: Do way less.  YOU’RE WELCOME.

JOHN DALY WATCH

Our boy JD is off the grid.  He didn’t play this week and hasn’t tweeted since April 13th.  I’ll let your imagination run wild with what you think he’s doing.  My guess is he’s in hibernation after an exhausting week of slangin’ merch outside of Augusta.  He made his money now it’s time for a month-long nap.

Given that the LPGA made it’s first appearance on SOTW let’s look at one of the hottest LPGA golfers, Blair O’Neal (instagram).  Roll it!