Does This Look The Face Of A Guy Who Threw A Mixture Of Egg Nog, WD-40 and Hot Sauce In His Girlfriend's Face While Playing Mini Golf?

Des Moines Register- A Des Moines man was arrested for allegedly throwing a mixture of eggnog, hot sauce and WD-40 in the face of his ex-girlfriend. Michael Lee Gatewood-Brown, 25, was arrested Tuesday and charged with assault causing serious injury in connection to the Jan. 14 incident. Gatewood-Brown and his ex-girlfriend reportedly agreed to meet at a Des Moines miniature golf course to exchange items they had left at each other’s homes. Gatewood-Brown gave the victim a few items, then went back to his car and grabbed a jug from the passenger seat, authorities said. He threw the contents of the jug, which smelled like gasoline, in the victim’s face, police said. The victim said some of the liquid got into her eyes and caused redness, burning and temporary blindness. She also felt nauseated from swallowing some of the liquid, authorities said. She ran home and called police and medics, officials said. Police issued a warrant and found Gatewood-Brown Tuesday.

I’m gonna go ahead and answer my own question.  Yes, that 100% looks like a guy who would do that.  The neck tattoo was a dead give away.  Here’s a sweeping generalization I can’t justify: Girls maybe shouldn’t date guys with neck tattoos.  The relationship is either going to end with you covered in egg nog and hot sauce or you talking to him with a phone through a piece of bulletproof glass.  Happens every time.  In this case, both of those things happened.  Every person I’ve ever met with a neck tattoo gave off a heavy “I like to throw weird concoctions of household products in my girlfriend’s face while playing a really fun child’s game” vibe that’s always off-putting.  Hey, I don’t make up the vibes, I just translate them.  Egg nog, WD-40 and hot sauce?  What a weird combination.  I honestly couldn’t come up with a more random list items.  Then to have the thought of mixing them together to make a face-burning witches brew?  Crazy town.  Was that just stuff that he handy around the house?  Is that a lethal combination that he Googled?  Lots of unknowns here.  The only thing we know for sure is that neck tattoos are weird and mini golf is super fun.