Science Says Beer Bellies Are A Myth

Telegraph – The “beer belly” is a myth as there is no scientific evidence to suggest that the beverage causes weight gain, a new report has claimed.  In fact beer, the country’s national drink, has nutritional and wellbeing benefits similar to wine when consumed in moderation, it is claimed. Nutritionist Dr Kathryn O’Sullivan, who carried out the review of the scientific review, believes that swapping beverages for beer may actually be a sensible way to diet. Although the industry-sponsored research may seem incredible to some it in fact adds to an emerging body of thought that the beer belly is a myth. Beer has fewer calories per 100ml than wine, spirits, and even orange juice, it is claimed. “Unfortunately beer has this image as a high-calorie, high-fat drink,” Dr O’Sullivan told The Times. “It is very unfair.”  If you consume huge amounts of beer you will gain weight, but the same is true for those who glug wine by the gallon. The report “Beer & calories; a scientific review” points out that the drink contains vitamins, fibre, and antioxidants and minerals such as silicon which may help to lower your risk of osteoporosis. Dr O’Sullivan concludes that swapping two large glasses of wine a day with two bottles of lager could save 58,240 calories a year.

Well thank fucking God. Because there was no way I was ever gonna stop drinking. The only thing worse than being fat is being sober. No matter what kinda diet you put me on, come Friday Saturday and Sunday I’m gonna be getting shitfaced. And if you think I’m gonna be the sissy mary ordering a glass of wine at the bar or drinking 10 dollar vodka sodas, you got another thing coming. There’s a lot of habits I can break but drinking a zillion beers just ain’t one of em.

So now maybe I’ll just give up orange juice instead to stop being fat. Wake up in the morning and crack a Bud Light. Part of your complete breakfast motherfuckers! Its got minerals and shit! Fuck Tropicana! Of course the problem is I don’t drink 50 bottles of orange juice in a weekend like I do with beer. That might just have something to do with my gut. But as long as science says theres no connection between beer and my gut, then I believe them.