New Jersey Man In Prison For 15 Years For Robbing A Shoe Store Robs It Again The First Day He Gets Out Of Jail

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NY Post – Christopher Miller spent 15 years in jail for holding up a shoe store on the Jersey Shore. And just one day after being freed from prison, he went back to the same shoe store — and robbed it again. “I have no idea what he was thinking.” said Officer Ralph Stocco from the Toms River Police Department. “We thought it was extremely strange ourselves that he would just rob the same store a second time so many years later,” The manager of the Toms River Stride Rite, who happened to be on duty in 1999, thought she had déjà vu when she saw Miller walk through the door again on Saturday. “I knew who he was right away,” said the 43-year-old worker. “I just think [he came back] because he didn’t get anything the last time.“ The woman said Miller seemed determined not to botch the holdup as he did two decades ago — and was particularly aggressive as he threatened a teen co-worker. “He thought he was going to die that day,” the shoe worker said. “He was red and shaking and I didn’t want him to faint.” The female worker said that she wasn’t as afraid of Miller during the first heist — even though he was armed with a boxcutter and tied the workers up. She said the hardened ex-con was much more menacing this time around. “I wasn’t fine. I have three kids and I have to think about my kids,” she said. “You’re kind of like, ‘Oh my God, my worst nightmare is coming true.’ ” Miller ripped the drawer out of the cash register and pocketed the $389 inside. He also tried to get the victims to hand over their car keys and ordered them to a back room — but the workers refused. He finally snatched their cellphones, ripped the store phone off the counter, and fled, throwing the cellphones in a garbage can and stashing the cash inside of a storm drain on the side of the building, cops said. He was caught a few blocks away and charged with robbery. He’s now back behind bars in the Ocean County Jail, where he is being held on $100,000 bail.

This has gotta be the dumbest motherfucker on the planet. And not because he robbed the same place 15 years later on his very first day as a free man. I almost respect that sort of commitment and routine. Dude is a shoe store burglar. Its who he is. Its what he does. Tiger can’t change his stripes.

He’s the biggest idiot alive for robbing a goddam Stride Rite. Who knew those places even existed anymore? How much money can a Stride Right possible have in its registers at any give moment? I mean the $389 he got is probably the most any Stride Rite has ever had at any given moment. Shoes there cost like 7 bucks. Its a bunch of old people spending social security checks on orthopedic sneakers. Might as well rob a Payless while you’re at it. Maybe knock over a Radio Shack to complete the trifecta of obsolete stores that sell absolute garbage and make no money. Perhaps plan a huge heist with an Ocean’s 11 type of team and rob a Caldors too.

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