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How Much Pussy Do You Think You Could Get If You Owned Chris P. Bacon The Wheelchair Pig?

Huff PoRemember Chris P. Bacon, the little pig that could? NBC recently caught up with Chris and found that he’s grown into a healthy pig and has become a bonafide celebrity. Since owner Len Lucero took him in 4 months ago, gave him his wheels, and made him an Internet sensation with an impossibly sweet viral YouTube video, the busy piggy has made television appearances, and is the inspiration behind an official website that raises funds for disabled children. His Facebook page now has over 50,000 followers. According to the Times Union, he’s even signed a three-book deal.

The correct answer is: infinity. Infinity pussy. Thats how much. Take all the original chick magnets and throw them right out the window. Puppies are old hat. Infant babies can kick rocks. You head out to the park with a fucking disabled piglet in a wheelchair and you’ll get your dick sucked 10 times by sundown. Imagine telling some broad that adopted a pig that had no use of its back legs, rigged up a little piggy wheelchair, and taught him how to walk again? By the time you could finish that sentence you’d be going wee wee wee all the way home. All up in that roast beef. Hey Wilbur meet me at home bro! Wheel your pudgy, Radiant ass home because Daddy scored some more Terrific pussy courtesy of your disabled legs. Don’t be Humble about it. You are Some fucking Pig.