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Homeless People Living The Fucking DREAM In NYC Shelters

NY PostFor out-of-towners seeking “four-star’’ accommodations here, there’s The Waldorf, The Pierre, The Plaza — and the city’s homeless shelters. “People pay $3,000 for an apartment here, and I get to live here for free!” said Michal Jablonowski, 25, who moved back to the city from his native Poland three years ago and is now staying in a Bowery shelter. “I have food. I have health care. It’s great,’’ Jablonowski said. “Here, the city supports you. The city helps you with everything.’’ City shelters boasting generous resources have increasingly become havens for out-of-towners, statistics show.  “We get breakfast, lunch and dinner. We have a microwave and TV. They do the laundry for free,” noted Jablonowski, who lived in New York for years before going back to his homeland, only to return here to a freebie life. Jablonowski said he even gets a prepaid cellphone — allowing 1,000 texts and 300 minutes a month — through Medicaid and boasted, “I’m going to get my teeth fixed.” “I love New York because you cannot starve in New York, you can always find food and clothes,” he said. “The shelters are really nice. You have clean sheets. You get to watch TV and stay in the warm. Homeless people have it so good, they don’t want to look for a job.’’  A Michigan woman who arrived in December said she was drawn to New York for the “adventure.” “New York is New York! That’s why people come here,” said Amy Kaufman, 41, who is staying in a city-funded Chelsea shelter. “I go to the library, and I go sightseeing a lot in Times Square and Chelsea. I like it here. “I’m staying here for a while because the housing options are better. Michigan is in a recession right now.”

I don’t think I’ve ever been more more serious or passionate about anything than when I say:

FUCK these people.

We all know I’m a big proponent of snaking your way through life. Take, take, take. Never give back. Always look out for yourself. Fuck everyone else. But these junkie fucks living the cushy life in homeless shelters can suck my gainfully employed dick. That fucking slut who came to New York for the “adventure” and now is just free loading on tax payers living in shelters in Chelsea? I hope she gets hit by the subway. Free rent, free TV, free laundry, free cell phones. Motherfuckers getting their teeth fixed while they live for free! You ain’t homeless if you have a house, a cell phone, and fucking veneers in your mouth. You’re very home-ful. More homeful than I am. I’m  hemorrhaging money these days. Pay $1,400 in rent. Hundreds of dollars more for insurance. Couple hundred bucks more in utilities and shit. Factor in food and booze and I’m in the red every single month. But I’m happy to hear Amy Kaufman gets to go to the fucking library every day! Happy she gets to go sight seeing! Very glad to know that all the “homeless” people of New York are gonna be walking around with nice teeth because they can afford cosmetic dental care now that the city pays for everything fucking else in their lives!

Also I’m real pumped to know that the war on soda and salt and styrofoam is alive and well in New York City. Lets not even worry about the homeless people living large for no fucking reason.