African Thieves Steal Drunk Dudes Dreadlocks To Sell On The Black Market

Johannesburg – A Zimbabwean man was recently robbed of his dreadlocks at a night club in Johannesburg in order to feed a growing demand for human hair extensions, a report said on Tuesday. The Times said Mutsa Madonko had his long locks that he has grown for 10 years, cut off while partying at a Johannesburg club. His friends found him passed out – with his head shaven. “When we found him, he still had his cellphone and wallet with all his money inside,” his friend Jasper Munsinwa told The Times. Natural dreadlocks are sold as hair extensions for anything between R200 and R2 500 depending on the length, said The Times. The extensions are weaved into clients’ own hair. They are worn by both men and women. Synthetic extensions have been used for years, but the Times report suggests demand for 100% human hair dreadlocks is growing.

Hey homie don’t pass out with your shoes on! Sometimes you get a dick drawn on your face and sometimes you get robbed of 10 years and 300 bucks worth of dreadlocks! I guess it just all depends on if you live in America and you’re a white drunk frat boy or if you are from Zimbabwe and the dreadlocks black market is booming. I guess the lesson to learn here is don’t go out to the clubs in Johannesburg rocking dreads down to you ass. Just asking to get jacked.

On an unrelated note, you have gotta be one wacky motherfucker to have dreadlocks. I mean I know with the Rastafarians its part of their religion or whatever the fuck it is they do. But like how about the dude from Counting Crows?

What the fuck was that guy thinking? Waxy dirty clumps of hair? For sure not.