SNL Accurately Portrayed How Every Drunk Girl Acts On Halloween

Last night instead of sleeping I watched this last weekend’s SNL and I gotta say, one of the better episodes in some time. They have been crushing the debate shit, that David Pumpkins sketch was bizarrely funny, and the Black Jeopardy was really good as well. But the sketch that really caught my eye was “A Girl’s Halloween”. Just three betches, out to enjoy a nice quiet Halloween, which inevitably turns into every white girl’s night out ever. Yelling at each other at 3 in the morning in the middle of the street in New York about losing their credit cards, needing pizza, calling each other a bitch, and then 9 seconds later having no memory of any of that happening. I’ve yet to see a pizza shop owner take out a hose and spray down some basic bitches like they’re stray cats, but I’m positive that happens in NYC.

As for Halloween itself, it’s basically just a holiday for girls to dress as slutty as possible and for guys to eat as much candy as they can before puking. Then on one of the weekend nights, we take our fat asses out, they put on lingerie and a pair of cat/mouse/random animal ears, and we try to convince them to let us take them home. Girls spend months coming up with the perfect costume, I’ve been thinking “what do I have in my closet that can be considered a costume so I don’t have to spend money on something before spending 300 dollars at the bar this weekend for it to be too dark and too drunk for anyone to care what I’m dressed up as”.