Barstool Idol Anonymous Blog #1 – Katie Holmes is Just Like Us! She Takes the Subway!

Editor’s Note – Today the 5 remaining Barstool Idol contestants are getting back to the roots of the site and blogging. Each contestant has written a blog which I am merely formatting, not editing or changing in any other way. At the bottom of each blog you can rate it on a 1-10 scale. Barstool Sports started as a blog, so let’s see what the guys got.

So once every 2-3 months there is a story where a big time celebrity does something to appear relatable and of course it is completely contrived and planned. (Donald Trump eating KFC during the election)

So the latest celebrity to set her eyes on the relatable card is Katie Holmes and for whatever reason this bothers the shit out of me because the whole world falls for it. You want to know how why I think she probably had like 3 security guard disguised around her is because the headline read “Katie Holmes Rides Subway” not “Katie Holmes Watches Several Dudes Jerk Off/Shit While She Rides Subway” The truth is if she really did ride the subway alone with no security than what the fuck is going on her life? There are three things on earth that are worse than riding the NYC subway and they are dying, dying while on the subway, dying while waiting for the subway and public speaking (for whatever reason that is always on any worst list). All celebs need to travel around in high style at all times because they are the few people that can actually do it and pull it off. If I get off a helicopter I look like a fucking meatball getting out (plus I don’t think with my weight I can get on) or if I get out of a Maserati I look like another fat white dude overcompensating for something but Katie Holmes can use any mode of transportation and for her to use the fucking NYC subway like the rest of us is preposterous. I don’t care when they broke up if you’re Tom Cruise you love this shit. Tom is out there like pretty much being the Jesus of scientology and Katie Holmes is with Jamie Foxx and riding the subway, boy life is wild. This just shows celebrities don’t get it, one time I would like to have a celebrity just come out and be the ultimate villain and just admit “my life is better than everyone else and I would rather die than ride that fucking subway”.

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