Two Cops Accidentally Left A Voicemail For A Reporter Talking About Her 'Giant Boobs' And How British Women Have 'Fucked Up Teeth'
Unilad – Sergeant Farnam of the La Plata County Sheriff’s Office was returning a reporter’s call, when it went to answerphone. He left her a polite voicemail about a law enforcement issue. Sound. Not a problem. Only he forgot to hang up.
After the polite message had finished, Sergeant Farnam started to talk to his colleague… About how the reporter was hot.
He said that his wife ‘hated that bitch’, and she had ‘an okay body and giant boobs’.
The conversation then turned to UK women in general, and how they have ‘big tits (thanks to the fish and chips)’, but they have ‘fucked up teeth’. He then went on to complain about how pale she is.
When she heard this on her phone, understandably, [reporter who received the voicemail Chase] Olivarius-McAllister was pissed off, and she decided to go public with the cops comments.
Sucks for these guys because at worst they’re going to find some suspension for the comments or particularly for being that careless with a reporter and at best it’s just going to be awkward when your wife who “hated that bitch” hears you going on about her rack like this:
I’m no giant boob expert but I’m pretty sure quadruple D is not a size that exists. And while I get the sense British people would be offended by the “big tits and fucked up teeth” pairing but it’s probably one of those situations where you say it and they shake their head and then you look at them and go “Come onnnn you know it’s true!” and they go “Haha okay guvnor tally ho you are indeed accurate.” If anything I just hope he’s got some science backing up his claim of fish and chips growing tits because I’m going to start blending it up in the hopes of convincing chicks I go out with to mainline it ASAP.
Also my favorite part of the audio by far was them talking to the police dog. Like I’ve had this exact conversation with my dogs a million times:
And this crack about the dog not being in uniform? HILARIOUS:
I just want these two cops to make it out of this jam okay. Anyone who talks to a dog like that is okay by me. It looks like Sergeant Farnam had to apologize and may have some other behind-the-scenes punishment coming his way. Stay strong, Sarge.
PS here’s the full pic of Keeley Hazell from her Twitter that serves as proof of the big titted part of Sarge’s hypothesis, such a legend:
