In Honor Of Lamarr Houston Being Put On IR, The Top 5 Most Embarrassing Injuries Of All Time
Here we go. We’ll get to Lamarr at the end (he is the new number 1). Without further ado the top 5 most embarrassing sports injuries of all time.
Honorable Mentions
-Sammy Sosa throwing out his back after sneezing
-John Smoltz burning himself after ironing his shirt, while wearing it.
-Milton Bradley yelling at an ump, jumping in the air and tearing his ACL.
-Marty Cordova falling asleep in a tanning bed.
-Dustin Penner throwing out his back eating pancakes
-Kendry Morales breaking his leg in the post game pig pile.
5. Joel Zumaya playing too much guitar hero
As the story goes Zumaya, who was one of the hardest throwing pitchers baseball had ever seen, was sidelined for the 2006 ALCS because of a sore wrist. The reason? Playing too much Guitar Hero. Games gonna game I guess?
4. Plaxico Burress shooting himself in the leg.
The only reason this one isn’t number 1 is because it didn’t happen on the field like the top 3 but shooting yourself is most definitely up there. Going to jail because of it too is probably the cruelest punishment of all time. Oh you put a bullet in your leg, well we’re going to arrest you for hurting you (it was actually because of gun laws but you get my point)
3. Martin Gramatica hurts himself celebrating.
Stephen Tulloch/Lamarr Houston before it was cool. At least this broke a 0-0 tie??? (in the first quarter). Also kickers aren’t people so that’s why he’s not number 1.
2. Gus Frerotte headbutting a wall giving himself a concussion.
The gold standard of hurting yourself. Gus Frerotte is like the George Washington of dumb sports injuries. His headbutt is on every monument.
1. Lamarr Houston
Now hear me out. Of course I’m bias because this just happened and it happened to the Bears but just look at the facts.
-Lamarr Houston just signed a 5 year 35 million dollar contract (15 million guaranteed).
-Through 8 games he did not have a single solo sack, see above for his pay and puke again.
-The Bears were down 25 in the 4th quarter against the second team offense.
-He was COMPLETELY unblocked. What an accomplishment that was.
-A month ago he told all the haters to “eat dirt”
-Stephen Tulloch hurt himself doing the EXACT same dance this year. No, I’m not exaggerating. Virtually identical.
So there you have it. Congratulations Lamarr Houston, all things considered you now have the dumbest sports injury of all time. That’s gotta count for something right?