Does This Look Like A Pair Of 76 Year Old Twins Arrested For Watching Child Porn In Their Bathrobes

LEXINGTON, KY (WAVE) – Twin brothers, arrested on child pornography charges in Lexington, served as volunteers for the Boy Scouts. 76-year-old brothers Jack and Jerry Cassidy, who were photographed in their bathrobes for their mug shots, were arraigned on Tuesday in Fayette County. Lexington Police say they found pornographic images of children on videos, pictures, cameras and film. Since the story broke, a man who said he was once in their troop has come forward with details. Gary Smallwood said when he saw the twins on the news, memories from 51 years ago flooded back. “The camp trip, of having to take my clothes off in front of them, you know there was no reason behind it,” said Smallwood. He said on a camping trip the scouts were forced to march around the campfire naked. Then, another time he said the men made him drink until he passed out, and he woke up without clothes.

I don’t know why I have to keep saying this but I will. Hard and fast rule I picked up a long time ago, never, ever, trust twins. Of course there are exceptions to the rule, but in general, if you see a set of twins you cross the street, you steer clear, you walk fastly or sometimes run. Because twins are not normal. And older twins are even worse. Young twins are cute to a point. Oh look, they dress the same, they have the same bow in their hair, how cute. Well not older twins. Soon as a pair of twins hit their teenage years they can no longer be trusted. Especially when they live together and are 76 year olds. That has we watch child porn in our bathrobes every night after dinner written all over it. Don’t trust twins and your life will be better for it.

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Also, if you’re a twin do yourself a favor and live on the opposite side of the country as your brother or sister. That’s how you twin correctly. You pretend your twin doesn’t exist and then when you need a cool fact about yourself at the company ice breaker or a bar you tell people you have a twin. That’s the only acceptable twin behavior. And don’t tell me you’ve never lip kissed your twin. I know you have, you know you have and the whole world knows you have. That’s twin 101. You’re weird, you kiss each other and you can’t be trusted.