Scientists Confirm What All Of Us Already Knew: The Best Hangover Cure Is To Never Stop Boozing

Independent- The “hair of the dog” could really be the best hangover cure, according to a new book examining the science of alcohol. Devotees of the bacon sandwich, rehydration solutions and painkillers may be surprised to learn that drinking more after a heavy night could provide more than just a renewed level of tipsiness to stave off the pain. Adam Rogers argues in Proof: the Science of Booze, that there could be an explanation why more alcohol relieves a hangover. Speaking at a Google talk earlier this year, he said belief in the “hair of the dog” cure had inspired a wealth of pick-me-up cocktails like the Bloody Mary. The most widely-held view states that hangovers are caused by dehydration but there could be another reason. “There is a theory that says the hangover is actually the symptom of very ,very small amounts of methanol”, he said. “The notion is if a hangover is methanol toxicity, you’re going to have another drink and the ethanol displaces the methanol off the enzyme and you will feel better.

Hey scientists, catch the fuck up will ya?.  Drunks like me and everybody else confirmed this theory a long time ago.  We’ve known this for years and years and years.  You’re not exactly breaking any new ground here.  People have been drinking to cure hangovers since hangovers existed.  It’s the only ironclad way to get rid of the awfulness.  No combination of sleep, coffee and greasy food really ever gets rid of a hangover despite what anybody says.  And the asshole who says things like “Nothing cures a hangover like a good run to sweat it out” can take that shit somewhere else.  The answer is booze.  Always has been and always will be.  And we didn’t need test tubes or Bunsen burners or periodic tables or whatever scientists use to figure stuff out.  After a night of black out drunkenness the only cure for the semi-truck that’s repeatedly running over your skull is a Bloody Mary.  Simple as that.  However, I do love the thought of a bunch of super duper smart scientists sitting around at a conference strictly devoted to finding the best cure for hangovers.  Maybe some of them wrote 150 page papers on how McDonald’s breakfast is the answer but nothing definitive.  Then one dude raises his hand and just says, “What about booze for a hangover cure?” and the whole room goes crazy with how genius it is.  So obvious that it wasn’t obvious.  Hair of the dog.  I also like that we drunks now have science on our side.  Before this, when a person starts drinking again right in the morning, others begin to judge you and your life choices.  Well not anymore.  Now we have the science trump card.  And that’s………that’s pretty cool.  So bottom’s up!