Pretty Sure This Chick Died Doing Gymnastics At Foxwoods This Weekend

Nothing leads to more disaster than drunk girls. Don’t get me wrong, guys get in their fair share of fist fights at the bar because someone accidentally bumped into them and spilled their drink (some even kill over it… looking at you, Aaron Hernandez). But I’d say per capita, girls leave a greater wake in their boozy path. Best case scenario they cry and get mad because you took to long in the bathroom and they thought you left them. Worst case scenario? They go into “Omg I was a cheerleader/used to do gymnastics!” mode. Oh you don’t believe them? I said I do. You don’t?!?! No, no. I said I do. Fine, then they’ll show you! Ok, I guess. But be careful. Clear the way, here comes the double layout full-in, full-out that they never learned on JV cheer but did win the gold medal at the Olympics this summer annnnnnn she’s dead.

h/t Dante