Please Miss Me With The Brady Takes Today. Please. PLEASE.

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Tom Brady didn’t play and the Patriots won again so I’ve been flooded with these asinine “Belichick doesn’t need Brady” takes. I have a fairly loose grasp on how the internet works and I’m aware that a significant amount of them are just trolling. But to the thew of you who think that’s a genuine take, I have one simple message for you…

Jacoby Brissett was a very serviceable third string quarterback last night. The gameplan was perfect, he protected the football, and he took what was given to him. He did enough to win the game. But gettttt the fuckkkkk out of my face with the Brady takes. Jacoby just barely broke 100 yards passing. The offense had their lowest offensive output in two years, they were extraordinarily mediocre. Last night that offense was a 1996 Jetta, it got you where you needed to be and wasn’t flashy about it, with Tom Brady under center it’s a motherfucking Indy car. Jacoby Brissett was nice last night, he was far from “The Patriots don’t need Tom Brady” numbers.

The Patriots offense was far and away the weakest link in last night’s game. The special teams was incredible, forcing two turnovers and Ryan Allen pinning the Texans at the one centimeter line at every opportunity. The defense was a brick wall, forcing another turnover and barely allowing the Texans past midfield at all. The offense? They were fine. Fine. With Tom Brady they’re historic. Shut up with the Brady takes, your a idiot.