Our Long, National Nightmare is Over: Gronk Cleared to Play Sunday

It’s been a tough 48 hours around here.  The Patriots offense looked worse than they have since Zolak was behind center.  Denver gave up almost 50 points and more than 500 yards passing and still won.  The Sox gave away a closeout game they should’ve won.  And even the Jets won, with Geno Smith putting up two touchdowns… and one 4th quarter comeback… more than Brady did.  Which not only means the Pats have just a one-game lead in the division, it pretty much takes the polish off their win last week.  So really there’s only one thing that could make all the problems of the world go away, and it looks like we’re getting it.  According to just about everybody, the doctors are about to clear Rob Gronkowski to play against New Orleans.  Seriously, the government could end the shutdown, global warming could cancel the winter, and my junk could grow to six full inches and I wouldn’t be any happier than I am about this.  As much as I truly believe that no one is indispensable, I’m convinced there’s not a problem the Pats are having that Gronk cannot solve.  The New Kids on the Block receiving corps is having trouble getting on the same page as Brady?  Wait until Gronk starts drawing double teams.  They need to run in order to be effective?  He grades out as the best blocking TE in the league according to Pro Football Focus.  They’re 2nd worst in the league in Red Zone offense (ahead of only Jacksonville so therefore technically worst in the NFL)?  It goes without saying how he solves that problem.

Granted, I assume they’ll bring him along slowly, like they did with Amendola last week.  He should take it easy for a while.  Probably limit himself to 25-30 snaps.  Maybe cut back to banging 8-10 coeds a week.  Keep it down to only 1 or 2 drunken Pile Drivers after the game.  Just until he gets back to full strength.  But even a limited amount of Gronk will help me forget all about the crushing disappointment that was the Zach Studfeld Era.  Gronk is back and life is worth living again.  [H/T to Jack Thornton for the graphic] @JerryThornton1