Does This Look the Face of the Hanover Mall Santa Who Was Arrested For Groping His Elf Helper?

Bostonherald - The Santa Claus at the Hanover Mall is facing indecent assault and battery charges for an alleged incident involving an 18-year-old elf, authorities said today. The Santa — 62-year-old Herbert G. Jones of Assonet — was arrested around 5:30 p.m. Saturday, according to Hanover police, after a complaint was brought by the young woman working with him as his elf photographer. “We have been made aware that an allegation of improper conduct has been lodged again the person portraying Santa at Hanover Mall by another employee working at the Santa photography concession,” Cherry Hill Photos said in a statement. “This allegation has been denied by the individual portraying Santa.

You Christians and your wacky ass traditions. Like yeah lets go have our kids sit on some homeless dude’s lap dressed as Santa Claus. What could possibly go wrong? Seriously what percentage of mall Santa Claus’s do you think are sneaky child molesters? 85%? I mean who else would take a minimum wage job to be a mall santa? Only perverts that’s who. No thanks. I’ll stick with playing Dreidal and reading books on how to be internet rich by myself thank you very much.

PS – You got to be a horrible groper to get busted for groping an elf right right? I just feel like you can get away with a ton of shit dressed as Santa that ordinarily you couldn’t get away with in the name of holiday spirit. Like people actually willingly sit on your lap and shit.   How do you fuck that up?