Valentine's Day Tip - If You Get Drunk At The Casino And Need A Place To Hook Up, Don't Do it In A Dumpster Then Get Taken Away By A Dump Truck Like This Couple

TAMPA, Fla. (AP) — Authorities in Florida say a man and woman who were intoxicated had to be rescued after falling asleep in a dumpster that was later emptied into a garbage truck.

Hillsborough County Sheriff’s officials say the couple had been sleeping in a dumpster outside a convenience store near Tampa early Wednesday. When the dumpster was emptied into the back of the garbage truck, they started screaming and banging on the sides of the truck.

Rescue crews were called just after 5 a.m. They removed 37-year-old Donald L. Jordan and 49-year-old Lisa Sirbella from the truck. They were taken to Tampa General Hospital after complaining of back pain.

Deputies originally believed they were homeless, but learned they were highly intoxicated after hanging out at a nearby casino.

Know there’s a lot of young lovers on here reading every day so thought I’d drop a quick PSA on all of you, a little pearl of wisdom from someone who’s been there/done that/read a lot of stories on the internet.  If you get hammered drunk at the casino, play a little footsie under the craps table, get handsy around the slots, decide it’s time to take this a little bit further and really end the date with a bang – spring for a motel room or something.  Go in the alley or parking lot if you really have to.  Just avoid at all costs hooking up in a dumpster then passing out and waking up to getting picked up by robot arms and dumped into a dump truck and either thrown in a landfill or mechanically compacted.  Not enough roses and Russell Stovers in the world to fix that V Day mishap.  End of pro tip.

PS – Love that last line.  “Deputies originally believed they were homeless…”  Nope, just coming off casino bender.  Same thing in a lot of ways, we’ve all been there.