Sound Byte From An Old Alex Cora Press Conference Shows Cora Implicating Carlos Beltran Was Cheating With The Yankees

Hey Alex ever hear of the phrase “snitches get stitches?” I mean Christ almighty whatever happened to honor amongst thieves??? If Alex was winking and talking about “devices” and shit after just getting your ass kicked in a 2 game series, what’s he gonna say when he gets a lifetime ban?? This guy is gonna sing like a fucking canary. Whatever happened to going down with the ship? Whatever happened to just taking your medicine like a man and letting your brothers in arms live?

I mean how much more goddam suspicious can a guy be? It’s incredible that we didn’t pick up on it until after the World Series. Dude brought up the word “devices” out of nowhere. Just randomly stuttering and stammering bringing you fucking DEVICES. Might as well be like “They really pay attention to detail...and I’m not talking about secret cameras and banging on garbage cans or anything like that. I’m not talking about vibrating computer chips inside their shoes or anything. Just like, hypothetically speaking. Just throwing those out as like, random examples of things that he’s definitely NOT doing. Stuff that we never did in Houston either, mind you. Just saying it’s NOT that stuff. But I know how he operates, you know?” Goodness gracious. Remind me to never get in a foxhole with Alex Cora.

But you know this is actually a great situation for me. Because if Beltran was one of the ring leaders and Cora is telling the truth (why would he lie in that instance?) then it means that the Yankees were cheating and we can go ahead and discount all of their success the same way Yankees fans have been doing to Houston. When the Hubbs’ and Tommy’s of the world have to admit that the Yankees were cheating too, after alllllll the shit they talked, it’s gonna be priceless. And, it means that the Mets now have a manager who is willing to do whatever it takes to win. He’ll cheat he’ll scratch he’ll claw. He won’t necessarily swing the bat with 2 strikes but he’ll do all SORTS of shady shit to win. By any means necessary. I don’t give a fuckkkkk what it takes. So the combo of dumb ass holier than thou Yankees fans having to admit they are cheaters too while also celebrating that my new manager is a competitive shark...yes please. Manfred said no punishing players so CB officially has Manager Immunity (that’s a binding clause per section 13.1.6 (A) of the commissioners handbook.) so we can just all laugh at Yankees fans while we implement new, less noticeable ways to cheat. LFGM