Listen To Mike Francesa Deny He Farted On Air

Yesterday Mike Francesa farted on air.  Whether or not he did, thats irrelevant. Perception becomes reality. The story will forever be “Mike Francesa Farted On Air” no matter if any air ever came out of his butt or not. And thae public is perceiving it that way for 2 reasons:

1) Because they choose to believe. Its like Miracle On 34th Street. Do I choose a lie that brings a smile, or a truth that brings a tear? I choose the lie and the smile. The lie and the fart. While tears stream down my face from thinking about being inside a glass studio with Big Mike after he ate a plate of Chicken Franchaze from Manny’s and ripped ass in your face.

and, most importantly, 2) because Mike Francesa’s denial is so preposterously over the top, he simply has to be guilty. There has never been a bigger case of “Whoever Denied It Supplied It.” This man had a 8 minute monologue…an 8 minute soliloquy on how it was a physical impossibility he farted on air. Never has there been a guiltier man. Listen:

A three part denial in which he invokes the President’s name and blames the Fake News Media. I literally dont think he farted, but I have no choice to say that he did because of the way hes acted in the wake of fart gate.