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God's Plan Is Apparently For Drake To Get The Bag Beaten Out Of Him By Kendrick Perkins

Drake is one of the smartest business men going right now. He currently has Nike and Adidas enthralled in a bidding war for his services, he has some of the smartest album rollouts in the game, he’s essentially become the Raptors mascot and built their brand up to levels that even Vince Carter wasn’t able to attain during his peak. So why he’d do something as stupid as to find himself in the middle of a war of words with noted large human being Kendrick Perkins is beyond my comprehension.

The NBA is a league with a reputation of being filled with fake tough guys. Even as a huge NBA fan I wont deny that. But nearly every team I can think of has one guy who is very much about that life. The Jimmy Butlers of the world. The Stephen Jacksons. The Tyler Ulis types. The Tony Allens. And VERY much Kendrick Perkins, a man who remains in the League to this very day strictly because of how much of that life he is about.

Kendrick Perkins is so much the guy you don’t want to fight Kevin Garnett nearly didn’t accept the trade to Boston from Minnesota because he was worried Perk was going to whoop his ass day one of practice.

From Sports Illustrated

RIVERS: The thing I liked about Perk was he didn’t care that you were KG or Kobe or Michael or whoever it was. He was convinced that you couldn’t score on him. He always made the comment, “You may be great, but not tonight.” I used to love it. I thought it really irritated star players.

KEVIN GARNETT, MINNESOTA TIMBERWOLVES FORWARD (1995-2007): We had obviously clashed and had numerous occasions where we banged a little bit. When you’re older and the big dog, you got little pups and stuff wanting to come at you night in and night out. It always got me going. It always motivated me.

PIERCE: They almost got into a fight.

Perkins’s barking still rang in Garnett’s ears when Minnesota and Boston discussed a blockbuster trade on draft night that June. The Celtics remained firm: Boston would only exchange Jefferson and a horde of other assets if Garnett agreed to a contract extension. Talks regained steam in July, with Boston having already acquired sharpshooting, All-Star guard Ray Allen from the Seattle SuperSonics. This time, before ultimately signing, Garnett phoned Pierce.

PIERCE: Kevin was like, “What’s up with Perk? Is he gonna want to fight me when I come to the team?”

GARNETT, CELTICS FORWARD (2007-13): I asked Paul, not really concerned but I just wanted to come into it, handle whatever we needed to handle.

PIERCE: I was like, “Man, you don’t even know how much he look up to you.” Kevin couldn’t believe it.

So yeah, his skill level may be at the point where he’s relegated to wearing a shirt and tie during games in 2018 but let’s be very clear: Kendrick Perkins would spike Drake and his legion of body guards through the Earth’s crust if need be. Just look at this Raptors security guard while Drake is running his mouth.

Screen Shot 2018-05-01 at 10.08.38 PM

That’s a, “Lol, you’re on your own here, pal. I’m not dying today to protect you,” face if I’ve ever seen one. The only reason Perk is back on the Cavs now is because LeBron knew he didn’t have a guy like this at his back for this playoff run. And Drake should recognize that before he ends up in a Loki-Thor situation.