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The Kim Kardashian Ass is a National Crisis in Brazil

SourceThe founder of Brazil’s Miss BumBum competition has called on women to stop trying to copy Kim Kardashian, claiming the trend towards ever bigger bottoms is ‘a cause for national concern’.

Cacau Oliver, owner of the hugely successful best butt competition franchise, claims Brazilian women have become ‘so obsessed’ by the American reality star that most ‘style their own bum on hers’.

And he appealed for them to be more ‘patriotic’ and avert a crisis by preserving the natural beauty of the iconic Brazilian bottom famous around the world.

The annual ‘best bottom’ contest is now in its eighth year and is Brazil’s most popular beauty pageant, with women who are crowned Miss Bumbum becoming overnight celebrities.

But last year the competition changed its rules to ban contestants whose backsides exceeded 43 inches in diameter – the same as Kim Kardashian’s famous asset.

Mr Oliver … said: ‘Unfortunately Kim Kardashian’s bottom has redefined parameters in the nation of the bumbum.”

As if you needed another reason to hate Kim Kardashian. As if her and her family’s very existence wasn’t already an Old Testament plague let loose upon the world as punishment for our greed an excess. Now her ass is now destroying cultures.

I have no issue with gentlemen who prefer a 43-inch butt. None whatsoever. You lose me somewhere around the 38 mark, but to each his own. I don’t judge. We can find common ground. But when your obsession with a massive ass starts international incidents, I have no choice but to speak up.

When Cacaua Oliver, the founder of Miss Bumbum which practically makes him the George Washington of Brazil, feels his nation’s identity is at stake, I stand with him. Kardashian has done enough harm to our culture without destroying someone else’s. He feels it’s the patriotic duty of his countrymen to limit ass sizes, then it’s my patriotic duty too. He’s fighting to preserve the natural beauty of the iconic Brazilian bottom famous around the world, then I’m fighting to preserve the natural beauty of the iconic Brazilian bottom famous around the world.

I’m not body-shaming Kim, I’m just defending another nationality from being homogenized to conform to someone else’s idea of beauty. To stop this cultural appropriation. To keep the world-renown Brazilian ass from being assimilated into the Kardashians’ Borg-like collective. I’m fighting for (Mr. Oliver’s words, not mine) the Nation of the Bumbum. I’m fighting for this.

Gisele-Bundchen-2

Long live the the natural beauty of the iconic Brazilian bottom.

@jerrythornton1