A Parrot Will Deliver All Of The Tampa Bay Bucs Draft Picks In Rounds 4-7

Just when I thought the NFL Draft couldn’t possibly be any dumber, the Bucs go ahead and do something like this… AND TOTALLY REDEEM THE DRAFT!!! I bet Mel Kiper and Todd McShay didn’t see this one coming in their crystal balls.

At some point, the world forgot just how absurd the NFL Draft is. Peoples lives being consumed by workouts, measurables, combines, game tape, pro days, and what is essentially a televised NFL transaction. Don’t get me wrong, I love it. I treat the NFL and NBA Drafts like sports holidays. I still get butterflies when I think about when the Giants changed the direction of their franchise by trading for Eli Manning. And in my mind, this Jets Draft Blunders video can go blow for blow in entertainment value with any other video in YouTube’s entire catalog.

Which is why I love what the Bucs are doing. If the draft is going to be broadcast to millions of people, you might as well embrace the ridiculousness of all this and put some entertainment value into the mix. Yeah old retired players and fans is nice. But a parrot is next level shit. Parrots are awesome. If you don’t like parrots, you are an asshole. Hearing this parrot going note for note with Sia in his rendition of “Chandelier” will forever blow my simple mind.

Incredible. Now I have a reason to tune into the draft on Day 3 instead of just waiting for iPhone alerts of who the Giants picked or checking the draft board to see if some random prospect that fell has been drafted yet. Day 3 should be the “Fun Day” of the draft. Animals announcing picks. Potential draftees and their families getting mic’d up at their houses. And GMs being allowed to celebrate like Pete Weber after making a good pick.

The Bucs also have given themselves an out in case they really botch a pick (*cough* Roberto Aguayo *cough*). Now they can just say that the bird delivered a name that was mentioned in the room for a different reason. Cris Carter always says you should have a fall guy. And if you can’t have that, you should definitely have a fall bird.

The thought of watching Ad Guy/EYAK Producer/Bucs Film Guru Steven Cheah grind through hours upon hours of film for late round prospects and falling in love with a few players only to hear a parrot announce his team drafted a player he hated would be internet magic.

We NEEEEED Steve on the Electric Chair for every Bucs pick on Day 3. Based on his Twitter feed during the season, I’m pretty sure he wasn’t planning on leaving his couch anytime the Bucs were close to being on the clock.