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Who Had The Better Easter Weekend: Jesus, or Gabe Kapler?

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Editor’s Note: This is our Phillies blogger Tbyrd’s joint. Give him hell over at @PhillyTbyrd

Sorry Jesus, but I don’t think your weekend was THAT bad. At least you got to rise from the dead. Gabe Kapler might not even be given that opportunity. Currently, Philly’s resident maniac is pretty much Public Enemy #1 in the eyes of the baseball gods. Over a 3 game stretch, he broke all the records using 21 pitchers, one of which didn’t even warm up, and now has been given an official warning from the MLB to calm the fuck down.

Having said that, I hope you got this non-sense out of your system, Gabe. The whole city of Philadelphia and pretty much the whole world of sports is mad at you. Actually, I don’t think mad is the word. I think the word we are looking for is why?

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No my friends, that is not games 5, 6, and 7 of the World Series. That is games 1, 2 and 3 of the 2018 season. How about some of those ERA’s. We got teens, we got twenties. We even got a 40 sprinkled in. And is that…is that Pedro Florimon? A position player who made the team over Black Lightening, Roman Quinn. Oh, so that’s why he made the team Gabe. Somewhere on that analytics card of yours it told that if you were down a billion, you could always use Florimon. Got it.

I know I’m one of few here, but I still love Gabe and have a lot of faith in him. I think he’s just trying to over-manage. He’s trying to be Joe Maddon, Tony LaRussa, and Billy Martin rolled into one. He is almost too robotic, playing percentages over feel.

Now Gabe, you are really making me look bad. On March 13, I declared this 2018 Phillies team to be Watchable. I take that stance very seriously. Having an average game time of 3 hours and 45 minutes doesn’t help. Also, managing every game like your Jackie Moon and trying every gimmick in the book doesn’t help either.

Speaking on behalf of Philadelphia (Not really, just me) I am giving you the benefit of the doubt. Like Peter turned his back, this city can turn on you really quick. Looks like they have already started unfortunately.

I’m no Judas, I got your back, Gabe. Let’s show these peasants what managing is all about. Let’s put this in the past, grab a hold of something, bite our lips and give it hell. C’mon! We’re gonna get through this. Tonight we are snowed out. Which couldn’t come at a better time. Primadonna Mets on Tuesday.

Go Phils.