It would be intimidating as FUCK to coach Frank Martin’s kids. Especially since he says he sits there all game completely silent, I would assume with his arms folded giving you a thousand mile stare. That’s much worse than some random kid’s parents yelling all sorts of shit at you while you’re trying to coach your way to a 4th Grade CYO Championship. But having one of the most intimidating coaches in any level of basketball right now sitting across the court watching your every move, picking apart your motion offense, wondering why you haven’t switched to a 2-3 zone because your opponent is killing you on the glass.
But to his main point, he couldn’t be more correct. I was an umpire, ref, coached Little League and youth basketball, as well as played all these sports, and it’s fucking wild how parents act at these games. Not that this is breaking news to anyone reading this, we’ve all seen one dad who thinks his kid is a few years away from the pros accosting some ump for having an inconsistent strike zone. But hell if I know what the solution is to getting parents to shut the fuck up and realize this game is nearly completely inconsequential in the greater spectrum of life.
Maybe we should have Jared Carrabis walk from gym to gym, diamond to diamond, sea to shining sea, and explain to these fine folks that nothing matters because the impending doom of the Sun exploding should be enough to put all things into proper perspective, while Frank Martin stands behind him staring holes through folks’ souls. I don’t know, it’s not the best or most economical option but it was certainly the first option that came to mind.