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We've Got An Update On What The Red Sox Offer To JD Martinez Reportedly Is

Arizona Diamondbacks v Los Angeles Dodgers - Game One

This is so fucking stupid. Here’s a list of legitimate Red Sox news stories since the season ended — they re-signed Mitch Moreland, got a beer sponsor, and Andrew Benintendi got a haircut. That’s it. I’m so sick of talking about JD Martinez and he’s not even on the Red Sox yet, if he ever will be at all. Again, he’s not even on the Red Sox, and I’ve gotta talk about this motherfucker every single day. Why? Well, because you’ve got guys throwing reports out there that Martinez is willing to hold out until spring training for the right offer, and then another report that Boston’s offer was $100 million over five years, and now this one that it’s actually five years, $125 million.

Five years, $125 million. That’s what we’ve got right now. I thought five years, $150 million, an average annual value of $30 million, was too much for a player whose track record really only goes back to 2014, or the last four seasons. Not my money, but just talking in terms of performance converted to dollars, I feel much more comfortable with this most recent report. Like I said, I thought an AAV of $30 million was too high for a player with such a short track record of success, but I also thought that an AAV of $20 million was too low to seriously be considered by Scott Boras.

This new offer is an average annual value of $25 million, right in the middle of what Martinez was reportedly seeking out and what Boston’s offer was initially reported to be. I think it’s very fair for both sides. You can even front load the contract so that Martinez can say he was a $30 million a year player for a year or two and then lighten the load towards the backend. Yippee! By the way, everyone acting like a five-year deal would take Martinez into his senior citizen years — 2018 is his age-30 season, so a five-year deal has him under contract through his age-34 season. I’m more than comfortable with this offer and would even go as far as to submitting it with a “take it or leave it” tagline.

All that being said, just let me know when this fuckin’ idiot signs. I don’t actually mean that, JD. I’m sorry. I’m just a weird combination of frustrated at the lack of action this offseason combined with having to write about reporters throwing false information out there, and pumped up for Winter Weekend at Foxwoods this weekend with the Section 10 crew. So irritated. So amped. It’s like snorting cocaine and chugging Nyquil. My emotions are pulling me in complete opposite directions at the same time and I don’t know how to feel. Just sign this guy for fuck’s sake so that I don’t have to fake my optimism about the upcoming season anymore.