Belichick Was on Top of His Game Not Answering Questions About Brady's Hand


Question: “When Bryan Hoyer steps in there like he did yesterday, how does that affect at all that team practice that leads to the team execution that you’re looking for on game day? Do you feel like when he’s in there your guys are getting the work that helps you get that team execution that you’re looking for?”

Actual Belichick answer: “Brian does a great job for us. He works hard. Practices hard.”

Q: “Does not having Tom out there limit your preparation for Jacksonville?”

Actual Belichick answer: “We’re going to continue to get ready for Jacksonville, all the way to the game.”

Q: “Now that Brady is dealing with this injury, looking back on the season, do you have any regrets about trading Jimmy Garoppolo?”

Actual Belichick answer: “We’re getting ready for Jacksonville.”

Q: “Does it look like Tom will be a game time decision?”

Actual Belichick answer: “Today is Friday.”

What a piece of performance art this was. An absolute master class put on by the undisputed master of the press conference. Proving once again that he is the Mona Lisa Vito of the football world … as she was in the … car … expertise … area. Just an epic work of minimalist genius. Part Samuel Beckett play, part Zen philosophy, part Jesus sermon, all awesome. With perfect delivery.

The number one story in all the world at the moment is the status of his quarterback’s Super Bowl ring-laden right hand. The whole human race wants Belichick to bear his soul. Share his thoughts, his feelings, his fears. And what do we get? Brian Hoyer is a good worker. We’re getting ready for Jacksonville. And the brilliant non-sequitor, “Today is Friday.” A phrase so simple it has to be filled with hidden meaning that philosophers will be debating until the end of time. Like “We’re onto Cincinnati,” “pink stripes,” and “No days off.”

And believe me, it’s my new all-purpose answer to any tough question. Am I worried about Brady’s hand? Today is Friday. Do I think it could be the fatal flaw that brings the easiest shot at a title they’ve ever had crashing down around us? Today is Friday. Do I believe the rumors that they surgically attached a sixth finger for Brady’s next ring? Today is Friday. Am I actually kind of crapping down my leg at the thought of Brian Hoyer standing between us and another trip to the Super Bowl? Yes. I mean … Today is Friday. Never, ever forget that Today is Friday. Now I feel better.