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Two Florida State Senators Had An Affair That We Can All Get Behind

Lotta affair talk swirling around the internets these days, but I wanted to shine a light on an affair we can all celebrate. Anitere Flores and Oscar Branyon, two best buds whose friendship “evolved to a level [they] deeply regret,” are in hot water down in Miami. And obviously, you’re not supposed to do what they did, and obviously, we should all ignore our urges and live boring lives and grow old next to a person who, once upon a time, was attractive blah blah blah.

But let’s examine the facts: first, Anitere Flores is a republican, while Oscar Branyon is a democrat. Now more than ever, we live in a woefully divided society. The lines of political parties separate us into disagreeing factions that rarely find compromise, let alone a motel room along the highway. Not only are these two love birds reaching across the aisle for each other’s butts, they’re also crossing racial divides for a joint trip to bonerville. Oscar is black, while Flores–I believe–is latina. I do not have confirmation of this, but I did a little research and the name Flores typically denotes latin heritage. Recognizing that I’ve made a few assumptions here, I am so proud of these two for their progressive relationship. They set a shining example of forward-thinking romance, and we should all feel encouraged to date, marry, or secretly pipe people of any race or creed in 2017.

Here’s to Anitere and Oscar, for their bravery and willingness to follow their hearts.