Saying "How Much Can That Toilet Swallow" Makes Me Laugh

I came across this tweet the other day. I laughed a little bit when I first read it but I’ve been thinking about it every time I’ve used the bathroom since. When I’m at the store, I think about it. When I was at a restaurant earlier, I thought about it. How much can this one swallow?

“Can that toilet swallow 2 gallons of shit and piss at once?”

“I’m sorry, sir. This one is only rated at swallowing 1.6 gallons at a time.”

“Buddy,,, I move the waste. I really lay down the thundering herd like I’m Marshall.”

“No doubts there, sir. I could tell by the wagon you’re draggin that you lay the lumber. Might I recommend this wide-mouth model of toilet? She’ll swallow 3 gallons in a single sitting.”

“Talented girl.”

“You betcha. Happy New Years, by the way.”

“And to you as well. Namaste.”