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DMX Finally Released The Full Version Of His "Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer" Cover

*Extremely Howard Finkle voice*

The winner and STILL CHAMPION OF THE WORLD….The Interrrrrrrnettttttt!!!

I’m not sure how many people remember this YouTube gem from 2012 that set the World Wide Web ablaze.

People loved that video. I imagine KFC blogged it on Barstool, the Devnest mistakenly deleted it from Barstool, and everyone patiently sat back and waited for a full version to come out, which never did.

Until today. Spotify decided to come to the rescue and give the people what they wanted all these years later. North Korea has a nuke that can reach the US? Eli Manning is being direspected by the only franchise he has ever known? Who gives a shit! Dark Max X just went hard in the paint while rapping about the most famous freak in North Pole history. I’ve never wanted to run through a wall during a Christmas song* but I was ready to go full Andy Reid Kool Aid Man gif the second X dropped his patented Come Ons, Whats, and growls took me back to when rap was rap and Christmas songs were the hottest remix in the streets. And if you didn’t bark at some point during that song while also wondering which gift you should get your loved ones on Amazon the Barstool Sports store, I flat out don’t want to know you.

Every Christmas song has it’s “best” version. Brenda Lee has “Rockin Around The Christmas Tree” on lock

Elvis IS “Blue Christmas”

I personally prefer the Jackson Five version of “Santa Claus Is Coming To Town” (as well as almost every other Christmas song they sang)

But admit that Bruce probably holds the crown in the public’s eye

Now DMX owns Rudolph. That simple. And since that is the case, I wouldn’t mind a remix where Rudolph kills Donner for being such a shitty dad either.

After rewatching that, I honestly can’t wait for CBS to air it’s annual showing of Rudolph followed by the 2017 Outrage Police flooding CBS with angry emails and tweets because of how ashamed Donner is of Rudolph because he is different.

*Outside of literally every time I hear “All I Want For Christmas Is You”. Fuck it, I’m throwing it in the blog