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Lets Go On A Journey Of Being Young And Drunk At A Wedding In 27 Seconds

RUMBLE YOUNG MAN RUMBLE! I don’t want to hear any hardos chirp at this kid for letting it all out in that video. That videos sums up what it’s like to get after it at a wedding when life is still sunshine and rainbows. I remember those days of feeling like I carved the dance floor up like a pumpkin (that may or may not be trying to get the pipe) during whatever Michael Jackson song came on. Now I’m just wallpaper at a wedding, staring at my phone and waiting for the next course to arrive to the table.

But seeing this video brought up all those old feelings of getting loaded as a young man at a wedding. Lets break down the three stages of this video, which mirror the three stages of any drunk outing at a wedding.

ACT 1: Drink, DRINK, DRINK!!!
act1

Pretty simple premise here. Get as drunk as possible, as quickly as possible. As you get older, you realize that you don’t have to chug hard liquor 15 seconds at a time. You just get in line with all the other shlubs and take that open bar to the woodshed two drinks at a time. As I got older, I also leaned on energy drinks to add that extra edge until I woke up one morning with the heart of a jackrabbit after drinking three 5 Hour Energies in the span of 10 minutes. Hand up, that’s on me. Pacing is the key to this stage, but the younger you are, the dumber you are and this kid going full Senor Frogs at a wedding is all you need to know about his Drinking IQ.

ACT 2: Emotions, Drinking’s Necessary Evil

act 2

Unfortunately when you pump your body full of poison to feel different, occasionally your brain is going to release a bunch of chemicals. Maybe it makes you say you love everyone, maybe it makes you cry. A good friend records those moments and deletes them. A great friend records those moments and uploads them to the internet so they can live on forever. Usually you are in this stage until someone escorts you out of the room or you get those emotions out of your body by simply vomiting whatever is in your stomach.

ACT 3: The Sweet Spot

The emotions have finally subsided and it’s time to let your freak flag fly. Everything you do feels like it is a 10000/10 on the electric scale. Now this kid is a bad example, because everything he does is actually a million watts of electricity. Luckily we have an example of someone that likely was not quite as captivating on the dance floor.

dnace

dance2

dance3

The only stages that the video didn’t cover were the super excited ride back in the shuttle, the subsequent crash and burn at the afterparty, and the slumped hungover mess walking into the group breakfast day as 20+ people say “This guy had fun last night!” as you wish for death’s embrace over some shitty scrambled eggs.