CIA Bomb-Sniffing Dog Fired After She Loses Interest In Sniffing For Bombs

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Telegraph- A bomb-sniffing dog has been fired from the CIA after she lost interest in finding explosives. Lulu the labrador started out as a promising recruit in the latest intake of puppies for the US intelligence agency’s training program. Then, according to the agency, a few weeks later she started showing signs she was no longer interested in “detecting explosive odors”. Lulu’s handlers tried to work out what was affecting her, as puppies can go through periods where they lose focus in their training.  In a blogpost, the CIA said: “There can be a million reasons why a particular dog has a bad day, and the trainers become doggy psychologists trying to figure out what will help the dog come out of its funk. “Sometimes the pup is bored and just needs extra playtime or more challenges, sometimes the dog need a little break, and sometimes it’s a minor medical condition like a food allergy requiring switching to a different kibble. However for Lulu there seemed to be no solving her disinterest and the CIA decided to retire her. 


Um. Duhhhhhhhhhhhhh. No story in the history of ever has made more sense then this story. Think about your dog for a second. What is your dog doing right now while you pound away at a horrible cube job just to make ends meet? Your dog is sleeping on the couch without a single care in the world. No deadlines, no bills, no rent, no nagging boss, no anxiety about the meaning of life. None of that. Your dog’s life consists of eating, sleeping, getting belly rubs and then those events repeat on an endless loop forever and ever. Now think about our girl Lulu here. She was born a dog and somehow got put in the pipeline of becoming a CIA bomb-sniffing dog. That is the worst luck EVER. What a waste it would be to be born a dog and have a job. That article keeps wondering why Lulu didn’t want to be a bomb-sniffing dog. Well I’ll tell you why. Lulu realized there was a whole population of dogs who don’t have to do anything. That’s their life. Lulu saw the light and sprinted towards it. She purposely got fired so she could have a life full of naps and milk bones. It’s not that complicated.