US Men's National Team Didn't Qualify For The World Cup And Not Having USA World Cup Watch Parties Is Going To Suck So Bad

Fucking brutal. Brutal I say! Not qualifying for the World Cup stinks. Why? Because the watch parties were always fucking AWESOME. Everyone getting to the bar at random times in the afternoon, ordering a million beers, and cheering on team USA to beat down random ass African countries is a blast and a half. Remember how fun it is to scream “I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN!” over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again? And now we won’t have that this year, and it sucks. It’s 1) Team USA hockey games, and 2) US Mens’ National Team as far as watch parties go. We have 9 trillion people in this country and can’t beat countries that have the population of Weehawken…not great! And now the middle of Summer we’ll have nothing to look forward to. As my pal Big Cat once said, figure it out! C’mon soccer, figure it out!!!