So by now most of you have you seen Feitelbergs “What Barstool Blogger are you quiz“. Now how it worked was Feitelberg emailed all of us a list of questions last week and we all replied just to him with our responses. So its 100% closed ballot, no one knows the other person’s answers. Which brings up the question, what were the most bizarre answers on the quiz? Like who actually does some of these things. Here are the top 5 that I honestly can not get my head around no matter how hard I try.
5. Favorite Sport – MMA
I like MMA. I’ll order an occasional fight during the calendar year. But if you’re “favorite” sport to watch is MMA you have a fucking screw loose. Like I question whether you even played sports in your life if that’s your serious answer. It just can’t be your favorite. Football, basketball, hockey, come on. One of the bloggers on our staff has a wardrobe full of Affliction shirts and now I’m worried we’re all going to get arm barred.
4. Favorite Part of a Girl – Personality
So this just has to be one of the guys not realizing this quiz is anonymous right? No way would anyone ever say they like a personality in a girl the most unless they think it will somehow get them laid down the road. That’s the only possible explanation. We’ve all said fucked up shit to have sex. Say you love someone, say they don’t look fat, say you want brains over looks etc etc. But that was all done with 1 goal in mind, not some anonymous quiz that allows you to be brutally honest. Hopefully this was a mixup and we don’t need to publicly chastise the blogger who made this choice.
3. Favorite Vacation Spot -Paris
This is honestly just the pussiest answer of all time. I actually think maybe feits messed up and sent the quiz to a girl as well. No other explanation. Isn’t the old saying “Paris is for Lovers”? That is actually a thing. So someone thinks they’re a fucking lover and wants to be romanced under the Eiffel Tower. My gut says Hank answered the quiz and doesn’t realize that Paris is in France and not a suburb of Boston.
2. What are you doing on a Friday Night? – Having Sex
Ohhhh well excuse me Mr. Sex guy. Seriously, whoever answered this needs to be fired from Barstool immediately. By the Common man for the Common man, Well no common man has so much fucking sex that they have it permanently penned in for their Friday night activities. Even if I had a genie who said I could have sex every single Friday for the rest of my life I’d turn it down. So overrated. You know what’s more fun than sex? Sitting on the couch, eating, watching sports then jerking off before you go to bed. Sex, what a try hard.
1. Brand You Most Wear – DC
This one just baffles me. I have no clue when Pres hired a 12 year old skateboarder but he did. Barstool just hitting all the demographics.
When Feitelberg first emailed us I was black out drunk on vacation and I initially answered Tommy Bahama for clothes I most wear. I was sweating the old guy vacay look so hard. Future me.