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Does This Look Like The Face Of A Couple Arrested For Having Doggy-Style Sex In The Middle Of The 8th Fairway Of A South Carolina Golf Course?

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[Pictures via The Smoking Gun]

AUGUST 29An amorous South Carolina couple was arrested Sunday for indecent exposure after they were spotted having sex in the middle of a golf course fairway, police report.

Officers were dispatched around 7:25 PM to the Tega Cay Golf Club “in reference to an indecent exposure,” according to a police report. A witness reported that a man and woman “were having intercourse on hole #8 of the golf course.”

When a patrolman arrived at the links, he spotted a “male with no shorts on and a female that appeared to only have a bra on.” The woman, the officer reported, “was on her back and the male was laying down with his head between her legs performing oral sex.”

I can’t stop cracking up at the image I have in my head after reading this full story:

As first reported by the Fort Mill Times, the complaining witness told police that when he first spotted individuals laying down in the fairway, he “thought that someone was possibly having a medical issue.” Those concerns were allayed when the man used a pair of binoculars and “saw the male with his head between the female’s legs.”

Two other witnesses–who were on the tee box at hole 8–said that they observed “what they thought was a deer laying down in the fairway.” However, “Upon closer inspection, they realized it was two people having ‘doggy-style’ intercourse.”

It doesn’t describe the witnesses but I picture them as like, mid-60s, a husband and wife out for their weekly Sunday game, he in his club branded quarter zip and she in her knee length khaki shorts and matching visor, peering off towards the hole on 8 to try and gauge the distance – should we go driver?  Or play it safe and lay up with the iron to avoid the obstacle?  Wait what is that obstacle by the way – is it alive?  Is that a deer?  Wow honey get the camera, it’s a deer laying down in the fairway!  No, dear, you know your eyes are going, I think that’s a person – oh my god, are they okay?  It looks like they’re hurt and possibly having a medical issue?  Take a look, should we call someone?  They look really hurt – wait a second, hold on. Hand me those binoculars?  

Oh, it’s a teenager fucking a girl doggy style.  Hold on – yup, he’s going down on her now to finish her off.  Oh yeah.  Eating her out big time.  Driver it is.  

Nothing like young love, two crazy kids so enamored with each other that they can’t keep their hands off each other or their mouths off of their vaginas long enough to even get through the front 9.  Good for them.