Protective Brother Lays Down The Ground Rules Before His Sister Goes Out On A Date

All smiles throughout this video. So much wonderful stuff going on. First and foremost, I LOVE Aaron. That curly-haired sweetheart seems like an absolute treasure, just melting hearts and breaking down antiquated racial structures like the goddamn modern man we need. You know he spent hours picking out that outfit but it does nothing to draw attention away from his boyish face and floppish hair.

Next we have the brother, who can’t decide whether he’s the good cop or the bad cop. Starts out trying to play the stern, protective brother but is so immediately taken with Aaron that he can’t keep up the act. He keeps trying to trip the kid up but his answers are so disarming. What does he do for a living? He’s a tiler with his father. You know, humble work, father-son bonding, blue-collar mentality… perfect answer. Gap year for the boys! Everybody loves twins!

One time when I was a senior in high school, I went on a date with this tennis girl from a few towns over. The tennis thing is important because her dad was her coach, and those tennis dad-coaches are fucking INSANE. Her family was Polish and the parents brought me in and sat me at the dinner table and interrogated me for 20 minutes before they let us go. I thought I was a parents’ dream–heading to Harvard in a few months, tall, clean-shaven, no criminal record or tattoos. We left the house at like 8PM and I had to have her back by 9:30. Barely had time to hit the crack pipe and have unprotected sex in the back of a biker bar before I was bringing her home.