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Donald Duck at Shanghai Disneyland Steals My Shtick; Passes Out Due to Heat Exhaustion

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Shanghaiist“Shanghai is an inferno these days, but unlike the Shanghai Zoo’s panda cohort, the “Imagineers” over at Disneyland don’t get frozen apples and ice blocks to help them sweat out the summer. The recent record-setting heatwave’s latest casualty was Donald Duck, who fainted from exhaustion during a parade last week.

Video surfaced recently on Weibo of the character slumped down in a Disney “dream car” before park staff escorted him away from the scene. The incident adds to an already checkered history for the Donald at Shanghai Disneyland.”

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So before I began my #FuckTheDucks campaign I actually had a long history of dressing up like Donald Duck in China. It all started when I took a job pretending to be that feathered fuck at some cheap disneyland knock-off in Shanghai called Happy Valley Amusement Park. However, just like the asshole above, I ended up also having a heat stroke. Shanghai Summers are no joke and that duck suit is about as well ventilated as a 3rd tier Chinese hoon lounge.

Now you’d think I would have learned my lesson after that but when Disneyland Shanghai opened up last Summer, I realized I wasn’t quite ready to let my Disney character aspirations go and applied for a job. Unfortunately, Disney decided to use me mainly just for sanitation work like taking out the trash

Disney Trash

and would only let me throw on the Duck Suit for “subway” duty.

It was humiliating having to be down in the trenches while the first string Donald Duck got to dance in the parade and get showered with love. That guy thought he was such hot shit even though I know meth addicts in Times Square dressed up as Elmo who were just as talented as him.

Needless to say, it brought a HUGE smile to my face when I heard the news he finally literally collapsed under the pressure (and outrageously high temperatures) that come with being Donald Duck at a Chinese Amusement park during the Summer.  If he was smart he would have snuck into the Enchanted Castle AKA the Enchanted “Refugee Camp” for a few nap/water breaks. It’s  literally the only place in the park with shade, which goes a long way when its 106 fucking degrees out.

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Donnie Does Happy Valley Full Episode:

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Donnie Does Shanghai Disney Land Full Episode: