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DEA Busts Four Million Dollars Worth Of "Uber" Branded Heroin So They're Officially Too Big To Fail

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(Source)You know it’s been a rough year for Uber when its name winds up in a crime story it had absolutely nothing to do with. The DEA announced late last week (flagged today by Gothamist) that on August 2, 2017, it conducted a raid in New York City that netted around $4 million worth of heroin and fentanyl, including small packages meant for sale branded with Uber’s name and logo.

There are a lot of stages to a company’s growth. You go from one man with a vision, to multiple employees, to providing benefits, to an office, to more employees, and one and on it goes. But there are two particular instances when you know you’ve really made it.

The first? When you become the verb used to describe the very service you provide. I’m talking about serious companies here. The ones where you’re searching for something on the internet? No, you’re googling it. You’re watching streaming television? No, you’re Netflix and chilling. Video chatting? Actually, you’re Skyping. When you reach that level you’re very, very major.

The next, and even more elusive, group is the companies that become branded drugs. At that point you’ve officially reached all levels of the socioeconomic ladder. You’re not just hitting people with internet access and great WiFi, you’re in the streets. Everyone in the world knows who you are. Once you’ve got people using your logo in order to add legitimacy to their own brand of heroin then you’ve become too big to fail. The world knows who you are and you’re about to enjoy a lifetime of riches.

Congrats to Uber!