Want The World To Hate You Unconditionally? Chuck Someone's 12-Year-Old Dog 30 Feet Into The Air

MONTCLAIR, N.J. (CBS) — A small dog was caught in the middle of a road rage incident in Montclair, New Jersey – and the incident was caught on camera. Gary and Linda Keay claim Marc Dionne had been weaving in and out of traffic before getting stuck at a bus stop and getting out of his car in a rage. “He was upset about the stopping bus in front of him, jumped out on our hood, stomped on the hood,” Linda told CBS New York. That’s when another driver started recording a fight between the two men. Dionne can then be seen reaching into the passenger’s side of the van, grabbing Kaey’s 12-year-old dog Daphna, and flinging her nearly 30 feet in the air. The dog was not hurt, but the owners say Dionne should be punished. However, Dionne’s mother tells CBS New York her son is the victim and Gary Keay should be punished for assaulting her son.

So let me get this straight. Gary Kaey ran a driver off the road, belly flopped on the hood, and ragdolled a kid 30-years his junior…all while his wife and newborn grandchild were in his vehicle…yet he somehow isn’t being scolded for his actions? Amazing. Now, how does one come out sympathetic in this situation? Well, besides possibly being Big Tom Callahan’s brother, have some Hipster Dufas chuck your 12-year-old dog into orbit. That’s how. And his damn over protective mother only makes it 100x worse. “Marcus was only trying to get the guy away from him, therefore he reached in the car, he’s not an animal hater he’s an animal lover.” Talk about an alternate reality. Come on, lady. Live in this reality for me, one time. Then again her kid could be caught next to a burning building with can full of gas and handful of matches and she’d still go “Not my Marcus!!! He would NEVER do anything like that!!!”. Congrats, Mama. You’re the reason your son is now known for his animal abuse as well being the barista at Starbucks who oversings covers of Vampire Weekend at open mic nights. Great parenting.

Don’t ever take it out on the dogs. Just, don’t. It’s the worst look possible. Unless you’re Jack Black and it’s a movie. Then and only then is punting a pup not only acceptable, but hilarious.