NASA States For The Record That They Do Not Have Child Sex Slaves On Mars

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NY PostHumans believe a lot of outlandish things. The idea that NASA is sending children to be sex slaves on Mars might be one of the wildest.

On Thursday, a guest on InfoWars claimed that NASA had kidnapped kids and sent them to the red planet to be sex slaves.

“There are no humans on Mars. There are active rovers on Mars. There was a rumor going around last week that there weren’t. There are,” Guy Webster, a spokesperson for NASA’s Mars exploration, was forced to tell The Daily Beast. “But there are no humans.”

The insane conspiracy theory was aired on Alex Jones’ “The Alex Jones Show,” which is broadcast on 118 radio stations across the country.

Jones spoke with Robert David Steele, who said the kidnapped children arrived on Mars after a 20-year journey through space.

“We actually believe that there is a colony on Mars that is populated by children who were kidnapped and sent into space on a 20-year ride,” said Steele. “So that once they get to Mars, they have no alternative but to be slaves on the Mars colony.”


So NASA definitely has child sex slaves on Mars right? No other explanation for this response. No other reason to deny it. A NASA spokesman doesn’t simply come out and claim they do not have child sex slaves on Mars unless they have child sex slaves on Mars. Be more insecure NASA. You can’t. Where there’s smoke there’s fire. When your boss says you’re definitely not getting fired, you’re getting fired. When your girl says she’s not banging the Soul Cycle instructor, she’s banging the Soul Cycle instructor. When the eye doctor tells 5-year-old you your eyes are going to be fine with age, they’re definitely not going to be fine.

And when NASA says they don’t have child sex slaves on Mars, they definitely have child sex slaves on Mars.

How about the Post trying to back NASA with some numbers here.

The two decades of travel would technically mean the hypothetical children were no longer children upon arrival, but regardless, the child slave colony is not real, so the math doesn’t really matter.

Ummm ever heard of reproduction? The child sex slaves get pregnant and produce more child sex slaves. Infinite child sex slaves. Child sex slaves for miles. For solar systems. How about that math for ya?

Scary stuff from NASA. Just another reason to be cynical of these freaks.