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Joe Thornton Is The Most Interesting Man In The World

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Joe Thornton turned 38-years-old yesterday. For his birthday, the San Jose Sharks gave him a 1-year, $8 million contract. Not a bad way to bring in your 38th year. It’ll probably be the last contract Jumbo Joe signs in the NHL so that $8 million ain’t a bad way to go out.

And how did he celebrate this joyous occasion? By throwing his Herbie Hancock on the dotted line, heading out on his diesel tractor and mowing the shit out of his lawn. Truly a man’s man. What a week for Joe Thornton. Between this and the ESPN Body Issue…

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…Joe Thornton is clearly living his best life right now.

His buddy Patrick Marleau will be wearing a different sweater next year for the first time in his career after inking a 3-year, $6.25M AAV contract with the Maple Leafs. Now listen. I like this move in theory from Toronto. They need to bring in some veteran leadership for all the young talent they’re working with on that roster. Marleau is going to be a great guy to have around that locker room. But I just don’t love that contract. The 3rd year is what really stands out about it. Patrick Marleau is going to be 40-years-old making over $6 million. Meanwhile, Nylander needs a new contract next summer and both Matthews and Marner need a new contract the year after that. We already saw how much money McDavid is going to haul in. Between Nylander, Matthews and Marner, the Leafs are going to have to give at least $30 million total to those guys over the next 2 years. Marleau will still be under contract at that point so the cap relief has to come from somewhere else. Which means Lupul is definitely gone after this year but that was probably going to be the case anyway. JvR is going to have to be on his way out the door next summer. Komarov too. So it depends. If you like a 40-year-old Marleau over a 30-year-old JvR then it’s a great signing. If not, I think the Leafs bit off a little too much here in a time where they need to think about keeping the cap clear for their kids.

@BarstoolJordie