Introducing The Chase Utley Quote To End All Chase Utley Quotes

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Oh, Chase, you beautiful masochist fuck you. There’s no telling the lengths The Goddamn Man would put his body through to ensure a chance at victory. His knees most likely held together by paper mache and he still goes balls to the wall for every second while on the diamond. He once blatantly ordered (and duped) a pitcher to plunk him before. Hell, he’ll even sprint like a madman to be the first to confront Goliath Giancarlo Stanton when shit hits the fan.

A Buster Pussy he is not. Chase will do whatever it takes for the good of the team. Not to mention after a relatively slow start Chase is coming in HOT as of late and is still a beyond productive ballplayer at the wee old age of 38. In the month of May he’s hitting .306 with 2 doubles, 2 triples, 3 home runs, 13 RBIs and 3 stolen bases in 74 plate appearances. Not too shabby for a whippersnapper. Like I Harry said, The Man.

PS – Obligatory.