Doing A Lightsaber Fight At Your Wedding Instead Of A First Dance Is A Great Move

Is that lightsaber fight as terrible as it is nerdy? Of course it is. Every single real life lightsaber fight is a 100 on the cringeworthy scale, no matter how fun or good you think they are. But the thing is every single person that went to that wedding knew what they were getting into. If the bride and the groom are doing a lightsaber fight as their first dance, you know they are a Star Wars supernerd. You don’t conceal being that crazed for Star Wars before dropping a lightsaber fight at your wedding in everyone’s eyeballs. The guests are lucky they weren’t served blue milk with their chicken, beef, or fish.

And who cares about the first dance anyway? The first dance is always the worst part of the wedding. All the momentum from cocktail hour and the wedding party entrances come to a screeching halt once the first dance begins. Then everyone begins to sober up as they watch two people slow dance poorly. If you are a Star Wars maniac, you should definitely let your freak flag fly at your own wedding. You are paying a ridiculous price to throw this huge party. You might as well enjoy every single second of it.

However I need there to be a winner in my lightsaber duels. The bride should have established the dominance she will have over this dude until death does them part by fake murdering his ass with a lightsaber. Bonus points if Robbie Fox is announced the entire thing.


Also it has to be said that Duel of the Fates is the best thing to come out of the prequels outside of Darth Maul, who they killed in the first fucking prequel after a full 15 minutes of screen time. The saddest thing in life is wasted talent. But wasted movie characters in shitty movies is Top 10 saddest thing in life.